Design Yourself

Ever found yourself in a place where your head keeps spinning on the same question (or set of questions)? But no matter how much energy you expend thinking about it, you just can’t seem to come to a confident conclusion? You are not alone. We often get stuck on “unanswerable questions” because they are rooted in a way of seeing the problem that is limiting our ability to move forward. In today’s episode, Sharon shares a simple process for moving from question to action. Learn what it means to “live in the question” and why this practice is powerful for helping us shift from stuck to transformation. Ideas Shared:  Let us all remember to be in the practice of resilience together. resilience, noun: 1. the ability of a substance or object to spring back into shape; 2. the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness Process for Living in the Question Write down the unknowable questions Capture the questions underneath each question Probe Deeper Gather information Watch your questions evolve Give you

With less than 3 weeks until Thanksgiving, the joyful and jam-packed end of year season is upon us. Offices are budgeting and planning for next year while simultaneously focused on ending this calendar year with a bang. In our personal lives, invitations to holiday open houses begin to hit our mailboxes (or more likely, inboxes) while we also plan out how we’d like to celebrate the holiday season with our loved ones. All this makes for a fast-paced season. Beautiful chaos, as I like to embrace it. To help keep your energies and spirits high as you wend your way to the end of the year, Sharon offers 5 actions you can take to seize hold of the white noise buzzing around you and begin to eliminate it in the process. Ideas Shared: 5 Actions to Eliminate White Noise Action 1 – Write down everything that’s on your mind. Action 2 – Look at Your List for Themes and Patterns Action 3 – Set Your Priorities Action 4 – Get Another Perspective Action 5 – Set a Clear Intention AND Goal

Life is too short not to spend your time doing what you really feel called to do. In today’s episode Sharon offers up tips and resources for just letting go of the excuses and going for it - whatever it might be for you. Learn 5 simple steps to move from where you are today to where you want to be. Ideas Shared: This week I had fun playing with Adam Kurtz’s new book Pick Me Up: A Pep Talk for Now & Later. It is a fun book-journal-workbook-guide thing with pages of prompts for you to fill out. One page in the book offered the space to “write some good advice.” Here’s what I was inspired to scribble down: There are two tracks that I see people on as they set out to go after the things they really want in their lives: Track 1: If you already know what you want Track 2: If you don’t know what you want Track 1: 5 Steps for Going For It…if you already know what you want… Be present Name the prep/steps required to get you there Do the leg work Name and cultivate the emotion that will serve you

Sharon comes to you today from the peaceful setting of the Hudson Valley to share some reflections and resources related to rest and stillness. Learn what’s different about intentionally choosing to hold something (and not act) versus feeling stuck. Hear how we all need to take rest after we birth something new into the world - be it a new little baby or a brand new business. And get Point Road’s take on the steps you can take to realize your current habits around rest to making changes. May this episode be a good steward for you finding stillness in whatever way works for you. Ideas Shared:  Below are a few tips discussed in the episode on how to find rest amidst “busy” times. 5 Steps to Help You Downshift to Rest Get clear on your current habits Do a habits assessment  Set an intention around rest or stillness Interrupt your addictions Find an accountability partner Resources and Links: Today’s episode was recorded in the midst of a beautiful family retreat to the Hudson Valley. Here is the space where

I know, I know: Death, Grief and Chickens isn’t, well, sexy. But this week Design Yourself foregoes sexy for a whole lot of getting real. With light hearted humor (hello, chickens!) and a deep well of grace, Sharon opens up about her own observations on the topics of death and grief. This is not a show designed to give you the answers on what’s right or wrong when it comes to these gritty topics. Instead it’s one person’s reflections and observations as she comes to appreciate not just what’s possible in this life, but what’s possible when we honor the full life cycle. Resources and Links The inspiration for this episodes’ title? Anna Sale’s podcast Death, Sex, and Money, which is all about the big choices and hard questions that are often left out of polite conversation. If you already know the podcast or just find you want to learn a bit more behind its managing editor and host Ms. Sale, I can highly recommend episode 94 of Grace Bonney’s After the Jump where she interviews this podcast hero/childhood frie

Think about it. When was the last time someone asked you how you were doing or how things were going at work and you leaned on this go to answer: Busy! In this episode Sharon shares what happens when we open ourselves up to the possibility of the spontaneous (for her it was a magical trip through Slovakia to discover the hometowns of her Great Grandparents!) as well as strategies for how to shift out of the default habit of “busy.” May you be surprised by what opens up to you in the process. Cheers! Ideas Shared: 5 Strategies for Letting Go of the Busyness Paradigm Stop saying “I’m busy” Name the real issue Gather Data Model ideal behavior Take a break When discussing the power of naming the real issue, I shared an impactful framework I picked up at a conference recently from Juliet Funt at WhiteSpace at Work. Here are her 4 thieves of productivity: DRIVE (Shadow side: Overdrive) Ask yourself: Is there anything I can let go of? 2. EXCELLENCE (Shadow side: Perfection) Ask yourself: Where is “good

When we think of play, what usually emerges are signs of childhood: playgrounds, kids running around, perhaps a cape, lego or magic wand thrown in for good measure. But here’s the thing, adults can - and need! - play, too. In this episode Sharon explores some of the research behind why play is important, leveraging the lessons of the great scientist and play advocate Stuart Brown. You will learn three simple insights that will challenge you and spur you on to play. Sharon also shares a few questions you might consider to evaluate what play currently looks like for you - and what might be possible if you brought more of it into your life. Let the fun commence! Ideas Shared: It’s important to build distinctions around play. Here are a few of the different types of play that are out there: Curiosity, safe exploration Social play – creates belonging Rough and tumble play Spectator play Ritual play Imaginitative (solo) play Body Object Transformational Questions for you to consider: What do you look like when

Some events seem to call more naturally for a celebration - birthdays, graduations, major events in our lives. But there is a huge opportunity to bring the celebratory spirit to those things in our life that no one is measuring or observing. Today’s episode looks at 4 simple tips for how to bring the spirit of celebration into the things you are working for in your life that might be unseen or unnoticed by the casual observer. Why bother doing this? Work is great for getting to goals AND celebration is great for replenishing our energy to keep working hard. You get to decide what a celebration looks like for you, but I’m here to remind you that you’ve got to make sure you are doing so. Enjoy! Today’s episode really pushes us to celebrate and to understand that there are a host of opportunities to celebrate BEYOND those moments that are externally placed on us (e.g. report cards, performance reviews, graduations, promotions, etc). The trick is learning how to create and move towards those moments that we choos

“Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants.” So says Epictetus. In this episode Sharon discusses money, money, money. Learn about the difference between operating from a sufficiency ("there is enough”) vs. a scarcity (“there isn’t enough”) mindset and explore the 5 guiding steps to ensure that money isn’t what holds you back from going after what you really want. Money ultimately only has the value that we give it; learn how to make sure that your values and your spending are aligned. Ideas Shared: There is a lot of chatter out there on money. Here are some quotes that really struck me as I was doing research into this topic… “Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.” ― Oscar Wilde “If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.” ― Dorothy Parker “As much money and life as you could want! The two things most human beings would choose above all – the trouble is, humans do have a knack of choosing precisely t

What’s possible? What’s next? We close out our 4-part miniseries on Storytelling by looking to the space of the future. Being able to set a future direction gives a sense of purpose in your here and now and draws you forward with intention. But this doesn’t mean it comes naturally. In fact, even though research indicates that simply focusing on the future causes us to be perceived as “leaders,” most of us aren’t in the practice of doing this. Sharon shares her 5 tips for stepping into a future-oriented stance and the gifts it offers. Enjoy! Started out today with a birthday shout out to my most fabulous mama. Happy birthday mom! This episode marks the close of our Storytelling series and we finish up in this series with a look to the future. In that spirit I shared a few of my favorite tips for getting into the future-oriented/visionary mindset (see below). Fun fact: Simply taking a future-oriented stance will cause others to perceive you as a leader.  (What does this look like in practice? It can be as

Carpe diem, baby. In part 3 of our 4-part miniseries on Storytelling, we go deep on the role the present in shaping our stories. We explore the power of being able to bring new awareness to what you see right now using the wise words of the late writer David Foster Wallace (this is water!). We also learn about how being really clear about what’s real in your present is key not just to telling the Story of You but to feeling sane in the process. Sharon also dishes on some of her favorite shopping destinations around DC. Oh and there are some crazy prancing deer that show up which lead Sharon to record the this episode in two-parts. Seriously? Seriously! Enjoy!   I so loved that the recording of this show kicked off with me being surprised by seeing a doe and 3 fawns prance around the shallow waters of Lake Wallenpaupack. The fawns were living it up –  jumping here, there and everywhere seemingly enjoying the splashing and fun of it as much as my own little toddlers are on this Labor Day weekend trip. In

Welcome to Part 2 of our 4 part miniseries on Storytelling. Today’s episode looks at the Past and the influence our telling of it can have on our present and even our future. Draw awareness to the importance of your story “up until now” and learn tips on how to revise and adapt your personal history over time. We all have the power to change and revisiting the past can be a powerful catalyst on this path. As we head towards Labor Day, Sharon also briefly looks at some of her own past experiences as she celebrates the end of summer and the transition into the back-to-school season. Enjoy! IDEAS SHARED “An imagination is a powerful tool. It can tint memories of the past, shade perceptions of the present, or paint a future so vivid that it can entice…or terrify, all depending upon how we conduct ourselves today.” – Jim Davis How to think about writing and telling the story of your past Make sure you are telling a story that works well for you.  Be mindful that what works for you now, may change in the future.

Today we kick off our 4-part miniseries on storytelling. In our Kick Off Episode, you will learn about the power of owning your role as life author and learn about how different leanings in time affect the way we interpret and react to events around us. Sharon provides a quick snapshot of what each Time Stance (Past, Present, and Future) looks like in practice and the importance of being able to move from one stance to another. She also geeks out a bit on the the genre of autobiographies (hello, English major) and some lessons that we can all pick up from the self-proclaimed “genius” of Gertrude Stein. Finally, she integrates throughout the episode questions your can leverage to step into your own genius and begin the practice of writing your own story. Enjoy! The book I quote early on in the episode is Paul John Eakin’s How Our Lives Become Stories: Making Selves. This critical theory was one of the building blocks in my college thesis on Gertrude Stein and the genre of autobiography. And here are the t

Today Sharon explores the topic of asking for help. You will learn about why flexing this skill is a critical component of successful leadership and sane living, what holds us back from asking for help, and why we've got to push forth and ask anyway. Finally Sharon offers 5 Rules of the Road for how to get past your own discomfort or habit of not asking for help and move into the practice of doing it anyway. Learn more about the Camino de Santiago – a pilgrimage walk through Spain that profoundly changed my life. (Among other things it taught me that sometimes getting to the end goal just isn’t the point.) Psst. If you are curious about walking the Camino yourself, here is a must read book, A Pilgrim’s Guide to the Camino de Santiago. Why Don’t We Ask For Help: We don’t know what to ask for The “Busy-ness Cycle”  It makes us uncomfortable No one can do it as well as me I’m in control, thank you very much Why We Ought To Ask Anyway: Our own capabilities are finite  We can’t do everything  You can lev

This week Sharon discusses the importance of embracing failure. (Fail forward!) Gain distinctions about how to own your own story, what it means to be (and be a part of) a deliberately developmental organization, and our default reactions to failure. Sharon shares tips for how to get comfortable stepping into the Fail Forward! mindset and offers questions to prompt your own reflection on this topic. Plus she brings in perspectives from both the "Harvard Business Review" and the "Gilmore Girls." Enjoy! Ideas Shared: We are all writing the stories of our lives all the time, whether or not we are conscious of it. When we own our authorship, we step into our power not just to own what happens next, but to go back and revise how we tell the story of our past as well. As the authors of our own lives, we tend to either write from the perspective of a Hero In Victory or a Hero in Retreat. I like to think of this in plain terms as operating from a place of strength (read: victory) vs. operating from a place of re

Sharon reflects this week on work life balance - or really imbalance. She shares the marriage advice that has stuck with her as she nears her 9-year wedding anniversary: "Marriage takes 100% effort to be successful, but rarely is it split 50-50. Sometimes it's 60-40. Sometimes it's 90-10. But it always takes 100% effort to work." After a near-decade she sees how this framework applies not just to our relationship with a spouse but to anytime we work with others. The most inspirational advice I got leading up to my wedding: “Marriage requires 100% effort to work. But rarely is it split 50-50. Sometimes it’s 60-40. Sometimes it’s 90-10. But it ALWAYS takes 100% to work.” Mimi Barringer Taking the Lead is the series from podcast Note to Self that I’ve been listening to on the regular lately. Much of the podcast follows two Brooklyn moms with a tech idea that has the vision and ambition to change the what it looks like to be a working mom. But of course they are dealing with many of the same stresses that they

Naming what you want is an incredible first step to any kind of change. In today's podcast, Sharon shares the first step in her Go Beyond Vision Cycle process: Getting clear on what it is that you want. To help listener's see for themselves what it is that their hearts desire, she spends most of the podcast offering a vision meditation (questions, prompts, exercises) to help you focus in on all that is possible. Wishing you fun and a few surprises as you play and explore here! Bravely and boldly looking out to what you really want is an incredibly creative act. In a literal sense, you are the creator of your future. The intention I hold for anyone – and everyone! – embarking on this process is simple: There is nothing stopping you. May it support you in whatever vision unfolds for you. This meditation evolved organically from my Go Beyond visioning process. You can learn more about that process here and if you fancy a playful workbook to support you in this process, you can check out the accompanying colorin

In Episode 4 of Design Yourself, Sharon talks about why stepping away from your computer and taking a break is one of the best things we can do for ourselves - and our work too. Bonus: You can hear the birds chirping in the background of this episode recorded on Lake Champlain (NY) at sunrise. Enjoy! This picture pretty much sums up my trip to the Adirondacks this summer. Open, expansive, peaceful. IDEAS SHARED Where do you get your best ideas? The shower? Running? I bet you won’t say: Sitting at my desk. Those breakthrough moments are unlikely to show up while you are pounding away for your umpteenth hour at the computer either. Point is: We need breaks.     Remember the false peak I discussed in this episode? Here she is in all her glory. Not a bad sneak preview of what was to come!   Here are just a few of the benefits of taking breaks: Allows us to recharge; Creativity flourishes away from our desks; We get new perspectives on old problems; Clarity of focus when we return to our work. Our view of

In Episode 3, Sharon explores one of the fiercest barriers to going after what we really want: Fear. Ideas Shared: Here are the two types of Good Scary that I most commonly see happening to us: Scary New – How can I possibly? I never have before! Scary Change –  What? Me? Do something different? Never! Scary Good Challenge:  When it comes to leading a life that makes you wildly happy/fulfilled/delighted – what are you afraid of? Another way to think of this is: What is holding you back from going after what you really want? How to Embrace the Good Scary: Step 1: Name and acknowledge the Good Scary. Step 2: Lean into that fear in small ways. Stretch your comfort level. Step 3: Ask yourself what emotion might help serve as a counter balance to fear.  Step 4: Exercise courage. Resources and Links: So this Bad Scary stuff is real. Curious to learn more about how fear works when we are faced with Bad Scary? Geek out over here and learn a bit more about the neuroscience.

In Episode 2 of Design Yourself, Sharon discusses the importance of getting started. Career moves, life adventures, and creative projects can only begin from one place - the one you are in. The theme for today is: Stop waiting + start doing. Listen to hear some of Sharon's favorite tips for how to get over the delay game and start getting the job done. IDEAS SHARED Eric Smucker of Smucker Farms is the visionary urban farmer and CSA pioneer who said yes to my podcast interview back in 2013. Fingers crossed I can get him on the show now that it exists. Here are the Erin Condren planners that my sister and I were using to capture our 2016 goals and intentions. I’ve had fun using my planner this year, though ultimately think I prefer something a little slimmer and more likely to make it into my purse on a daily basis. (I hate to be weighed down!) I recently picked up one of Appointed’s planners for my husband that I’m loving – and not just because he’s suddenly using a planner. (Though I’m not complaining abo