Bearded Scrutiny

In this episode the team reveals their lists for the best of 2014! Well, one half of the team does. The other half? Not so much.

Yep, it's time for an old fashioned brohang! This week the team sits back, relaxes, and chats about everything from the Ant-Man trailer, to Birdman, to Will Smith, and partially nude actresses in weird movies about charcoal aliens disguised in human flesh.

This week the team digs into David Cronenberg's, 1970's sex-zombie flick, Shivers. They also spend some time talking about the state of network television, Interstellar, and Bill Cosby's rape-abilities. 

Just in time for the Blu-Ray and VOD release, the team settles in to review Marvel's, Guardians Of The Galaxy. The fact that the episode was actually recorded around the time of the theatrical release isn't important at all.Nope.Not one bit.They also talk about Howard The Duck and beastiality, the Ghostbusters remake, and Jeffery Jones being a sex offender.So there's that.

This week the team takes an hour or so to catch up on, and review, everything they've seen over the last month. They Came Together, X-Men: Days of Future Past, a bunch of documentaries, a whole lot of television, and bunch of other stuff I can't remember, and am too lazy to look up. Plus John introduces his new catch phrase.It's a pretty "cool" episode.

This week the team offers up a commentary track for one of Arnold's "greatest," The Running Man. Sit back, grab yourself a drink, and listen as they try to figure out the specifics of the game show, and admit to hidden desires to tie up women.Yep.

In this episode the crew settles in to review the only movie Stephen King ever directed, Maximum Overdrive. It doesn't take long before we discover why it's the only thing he ever direction.Seriously, it stinks.

In this episode the dynamic duo of crappy reviewing tears into The Boondock Saints. For some reason it's wildly considered a "cult classic." We're not sure why. 

In this episode the crew takes a shot at a glorious piece of dooookkkkiiieeeeee called, No Holds Barred. When they're done with that they settle into a twenty minute discussion on Captain America: The Winter Soldier. 

In this episode the team settles in to review a little B movie from way back called, The Angry Red Planet. It's about a trip to Mars, some cartoon aliens, a red haze that'll burn your retinas, sexism, hairy chests, and a character who may or may not make sweet love to a freeze ray. 

This week we somehow we ended up reviewing soft core 70's porn. *shrugs* There's also some quick reviews of Nebraska, Inside Llewyn Davis, and Riddick. Plus we talk about sports? Yep, it's a weird one.  

This week the team offers up a commentary track for the 90's hot mess that is Double Dragon. That's right, now you can watch this pile of crap with us. We're spreading the misery. It's what we do best.

They've done it! This week the boys tear into the last Twilight movie! They'll never have to review another of these again!

This week the team tries to make sense of the much-hyped, All The Boys Love Mandy Lane. When they're done with that they dig into the series finale of Dexter, Red 2, and some real, grown-up, man-sized problems. This is serious stuff. Seriously.

This week the team dissects Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters and discovers it isn't nearly as awful as they expected it to be. When they're done with that they bring up the Razzie Awards, Anchorman 2, The Lone Ranger, and try to make sense of Shia LaBeouf's recent life choices.

Another list episode! This week the team offers up the opinions on the best and worst sequels of all time. Everything from The Godfather 2, to the Godfather 3 and American Pshycho 2 is discussed. They also discuss the need for accuracy in movies based on real-life events and the phrase, "When you dance with the Devil, you can't be annnoyed that your floors get scuffed" is uttered. Yep, someone really said that.

This week the team digs into the Tomb Raider movies! All two of them. Everything from Angelina Jolie's breasts, to John Voight's ass is discussed, and the words, "I like a little more beef on my flank steak" are muttered. Yep, it's that kind of episode. When they're done with Tomb Raider they crew digs into Jack Reacher, Gravity, and a bunch of other stuff they've seen recently. This one's worth a listen.

This week the boys decide to torture themselves and attempt to review over two hours of the Stephenie Meyer, Science-Fiction, Romance, teenage smoochfest, The Host. Oh, Stephenie Meyer, we hate you so much.

On this episode the crew digs into The Highlander Series. Well, three of the movies anyway. Everything from the fantastic first film and the awfulness that came after, to the fact that immortals drop more panties than beards is discussed. If you're a fan of the series you'll find no better retrospective than this. coughthatwasaliecough 

In an absolute doozy of an episode the team sifts through the cinematic mess that is Event Horizon. Everything from Sam Neill's shirtless strut, to Paul W.S. Anderson's confusing career is covered. They also weigh-in on Ben Affleck's promotion to the mantle of the Bat, old dudes who refuse to call it a day, and run through a lengthy list of flicks they've seen during the hiatus.