You, Me, Empathy: Sharing Our Mental Health Stories

On Episode 132 of You, Me, Empathy, Amber Cole and I explore white fragility, overt and covert forms of racism, and the violence that is happening right now against people of color, and black people specifically. We talk about the every day work it takes to embody anti-racism, the collective trauma the black community is living right now, and how we can more thoughtfully and empathetically lift each other up. Black. Lives. Matter. Amber also opens up about her passion for the work she does as a therapist specializing in child welfare, substance use, and social policy. She beautifully and compassionately shares her experience growing up with a mother who struggled with substance use disorders, how Amber was born with fetal alcohol syndrome, and how she’s using her experiences as fuel for empathy, understanding, and healing for herself and others. I really loved this conversation with Amber. I really love Amber! And I think you will too. EMPATHY LINKS: Amber on IG: @translucentresinMinnesota Freedom FundMo

On Episode 131 of You, Me, Empathy, it’s a VERY SPECIAL episode because it’s launch week for The Feely Human Collective! Eeeeeeeep! On Wednesday, May 27, Feely Human launches to the public! And my friend and Feely Human intern, Tristan Manzolini, sits down with me to talk all about it! We explore what Feely Human is, what the future holds for Feely Human, how Tristan has contributed as intern the past couple of months, the Feely Human Book Club, the Feely Human 101 workshop and the special heartwork you get when you enroll (it’s free and will be live on launch day!), how you as a writer, educator, and artist can collaborate with Feely Human, and much more! Feely humans, I am SO excited to share The Feely Human Collective with you. May 27! Mark your calendars! And go check out FeelyHuman.co now and sign up for the newsletter! Thanks to Tristan for being a part of this magical journey with me! Note: You, Me, Empathy is taking a mini hiatus so I can recuperate! So, no episodes in June. New episodes resume in

On Episode 130 of You, Me, Empathy, Emily Lynn Paulson and I explore recovery from substance use disorder, the sober curious movement, the gifted child, the pride that comes with being in control even if that control is damaging, and getting to the roots of our mental health struggles. We also talk about Emily’s morning routine of getting in touch with all of her senses, growing up with depression, feeling different, and not having a strong sense of self. Emily shares how she figured out she had a drinking problem, the first time her mom caught her purging, how even after a DUI her doctor and friends didn’t think she had a problem with alcohol, and why substance use disorder was a symptom of her deeper rooted mental health struggles. And so much more! Emily wrote a book called Highlight Real: Finding Honesty and Recovery Behind the Filtered Life, which you can buy here. Thanks to Emily for sharing her story! Trigger Warning: Sexual assault, eating disorders, suicide, and substance use disorder mentioned in

On Episode 129 of You, Me, Empathy, New York Times bestselling author Esmé Weijun Wang and I explore the exercise in empathy that is this Coronavirus pandemic, how constraints can be a useful force in our creativity, managing feelings of despair, 90s online communities, how beautifully resilient humans are, hallucinations as kidnapping the senses, and Esme’s stunning part-memoir and part-deep dive into schizophrenia, The Collected Schizophrenias. This episode was recorded just as the Coronavirus pandemic really took off, and so Esmé and I talk about the collective anxiety of it, herd immunity, the 24-hour news cycle, how this time is impacting people with chronic illness and mental illness, and how this time illuminates the fact that we, as feely humans, are not meant to be individualistic; we’re meant to be connected and together. We also gab about constraints and creativity, Daphne the dog (!), managing chronic pain by breaking it down into smaller, more manageable parts (“I can get through the next 5 sec

On Episode 128 of You, Me, Empathy, Alie Ward and I explore the magic of curiosity, Alie’s anxiety diagnosis, Catholic guilt, reframing failures, why empathy is so damn hard (and the best, duh), why Alie works so hard, and mental health in relationships! We also talk about Alie’s experience getting catfished, sorting out our emotions without feeling the emotions of another person, the trials and tribulations of the People Pleaser, why we judge ourselves so much, sleep hygiene, the danger and unhealthiness of a binary lens, ADHD, righteous grandparents, and why Alie is the dad the world needs (#dadWard). Alie is the creator and host of the remarkable science podcast, Ologies. Also, she has a show on Netflix called 100 Humans. And so many other amazing things you can check out in the Empathy Links below! Thanks to Alie for sharing her story! P.S. This chat was recorded pre-stay at home, pre-quarantine, pre-pandemic! P.P.S. The Feely Human Collective is coming in May 27, 2020! Empathy Links AlieWard.comAli

On Episode 127 of You, Me, Empathy, Lisa Congdon and I have a conversation about the emotional rollercoaster of Lisa’s breast cancer diagnosis, the decision to talk openly about it, showing our full selves, why we can’t have connection without vulnerability, creating art in our own wonderfully unique way, and the terrible and the beautiful we hold in us. We also explore what her cancer means for her identity and how it impacts her art and community (note: Lisa’s doctors caught the cancer early and she’s doing well!), being present with ourselves during the highs and the lows, why our mistakes aren’t us, holding space for the nuance and non-binary world we live in, Lisa’s experience with creative burnout and impostor syndrome, people pleasing, and how art can be a release of control! Thanks to Lisa for sharing her story! P.S. This chat was recorded pre-Coronavirus. P.P.S. these show notes will soon live at FeelyHuman.co, which is also where you should sign up for the newsletter. The Feely Human Collective

On Episode 126 of You, Me, Empathy, Janet Reich Elsbach and I explore the loss of her sister and mother, being thrown into a practicum of grief, receiving help during the grieving process, food for healing and nourishment, and Janet’s memoir/recipe book, Extra Helping: Recipes for Caring, Connecting, & Building Community One Dish At a Time. We may be socially distancing and staying home during this COVID-19 pandemic, we can still heal each other and connect with our families through food. Yay food! BOOK GIVEAWAY I’m giving away three (3) copies of Janet’s beautiful book, Extra Helping! To enter, head to this episode’s post on Instagram! Plus, we talk about Janet’s favorite thing to make (Congee), empathy and grief, how food connects us, and so much more. Thanks to Janet for sharing her story! P.S. This chat was recorded pre-Coronavirus. Empathy Links Janet ElsbachJanet on IG: @raisinporpoiseJanet’s book, Extra HelpingEnter to win a copy of the book over @YouMeEmpathy on IG!Big NightFinding Fred pod

On Episode 125 of You, Me, Empathy, therapist and New York Times bestselling author, Lori Gottlieb and I explore having compassion and empathy for ourselves first, operating out of fear or love, society not accepting vulnerability in men, compassion without forgiveness, Lori’s amazing book, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, and how we grow in connection with others. In this shorter episode, Lori and I get right to it and talk about her New York Times bestseller, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone. We talk about how you can’t grow without having compassion for yourself, feeling alone in our experiences, and why the book doesn’t necessarily mean we should all go to therapy; it means we should talk more with each other. We also gab about fear and love, control, men and their feelings, cultural norms we internalize then allow to seep into our interpersonal relationships, listening as part of empathy, and why you don’t need to forgive a person to have compassion for them. Plus, look out for Maybe You Should Talk

On Episode 124 of You, Me, Empathy, author, comedian, and Well, This Isn’t Normal podcaster Sara Benincasa and I explore limiting beliefs, the allusion of Hollywood, identity work in mental health, Sara’s experience with panic attacks and agoraphobia, sobriety and what addiction means to Sara, and our new friend, Jennifer. Kicking off the show, I mention I was surprised Sara even said yes to being on the show, and then we both empathized over the limiting beliefs we put on ourselves. We gab about the sometimes delusions and allusions of working in Hollywood (Sara is a comedian, author, tv writer, etc.), and why identity is so important in our mental health. Sara shares her experience living with panic attacks and agoraphobia, being diagnosed with depression at age fourteen, her sober grandma’s inspiration, finding the right medication, the stigma of divorce as a “failure,” our new friend Jennifer, and SO MUCH MORE. Trigger warning: Suicidal ideation, depression, panic attacks, sobriety. EMPATHY LINKS Sar

On Episode 123 of You, Me, Empathy, it’s a special bonus episode where I sit down with three therapists to discuss empathy, anxiety, spirituality, self-care, eating disorder recovery, and mental health in the time of this current global pandemic: Coronavirus, or COVID-19. First up, I chat with Sydni Marmor. Sydni and I explore self-development, self-love, self-compassion, and looking at life as a playground as opposed to how we’re not doing things “right or wrong.” We talk about mistakes as mini adventures, the kindness pandemic, being empathetic to the people who are panic buying, and how we can use this time to cultivate change with empathy rather than through anger. Next I chat with Becky (or BeX) Kagan. BeX and I explore being a highly sensitive person during this time, how being strong doesn’t mean being without emotion, sitting with our feelings, activities that help us get our feelings and anxieties out of our bodies, control, FFTs (F*@cking First Times), radical acceptance, paying attention to the

On Episode 122 of You, Me, Empathy, eating disorder therapist and founder of The Eating Disorder Center, Jennifer Rollin, and I explore Jennifer’s personal eating disorder journey and recovery, how eating disorders can be a coping mechanism for underlying issues, the signs that you may be struggling with an eating disorder, the myths of eating disorders, and how to help someone who’s struggling with an eating disorder. Jennifer opens up about her own mental health journey, including comparing herself to others in high school, struggling with anxiety, taking Adderall to eat less and lose weight, and the first time she admitted she had a problem. We talk about the insidiousness of diet culture, eating disorders as a coping mechanism that masks deeper issues such as anxiety, feeling out of control, trauma, not feeling “good enough,” self-worth, and others. We explore the surefire signs of an eating disorder (e.g. constantly thinking about food), how to support someone who’s in the throes of an eating disorder,

In Episode 121 of You, Me, Empathy, Sarah Kinger and I explore recognizing our needs, rewriting old narratives, eating disorder recovery, disowning the concept of perfect, and why you matter, we matter, and being a light for others. We talk about burnout, figuring out where our old narratives and stories come from, the ins and outs of eating disorder recovery, inpatient treatment for eating disorders, self-harm, suicidal ideation, the feeling of being safe in our sickness, showing up with love for people, the control we put on ourselves and our worlds, and truly why you and me and all of us matter. Trigger Warning: Self-harm, suicidal ideation, and eating disorders are mentioned in this episode. EMPATHY LINKS Sarah Kinger on IG: @sarah.is.smilingSarah’s personal IG: @imsarahkinger SUPPORT US Sign up for The Feely Human Collective newsletter!Become a You, Me, Empathy patron on Patreon!Subscribe, rate, review You, Me, Empathy on iTunesSubscribe, rate, review You, Me, Empathy on GoogleGet yourself a You, M

On Episode 120 of You, Me, Empathy, Grant Snider and I explore Grant’s transition from freelance artist to published author, boundaries for freelancers, why constraints can be good for creativity, drawing as visualized empathy, and looking closer and listening to the people and world around us. Grant is the author of The Shape of Ideas (2017), and most recently, What Color Is Night?, a picture book from Chronicle Books. In May 2020, he has two more books coming out: What Sound is Morning? and I Will Judge You By Your Bookshelf—both available for pre-order now! Grant and I talk about transitioning from more freelancing cartooning to being a published author. Grant talks about being a dad and showing up for his kids when he’s on a deadline, managing life as an orthodontist (yes, you heard that right!) and an artist, dealing with burnout as a creative, committing to too much, learning to say now, boundaries for freelancers, and so much more. Finally, we gab about mindfulness, getting lost in the beauty of lif

On Episode 119 of You, Me, Empathy, Maggie Jones and I explore intergenerational trauma, the cultural pressure put on mothers, feeling permission to be who we are, trying to befriend our inner critic, and the heartbreak and healing in intuitive grief. Sign up for The Feely Human Collective email list. Follow You, Me, Empathy on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Follow Feely Human on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Subscribe, rate, review You, Me, Empathy on Apple Podcasts! Trigger warning: suicidal ideation, death of a child, eating disorders, and depression mentioned.

On Episode 118 of You, Me, Empathy, Julie Peters and I explore nourishment, trying to be in our bodies, the misogyny of victim blaming and not believing women, and recovering desire, passion, and pleasure after sexual assault. Pick up a copy of Julie's book, Want. Sign up for The Feely Human Collective email list. Follow You, Me, Empathy on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Follow Feely Human on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Subscribe, rate, review You, Me, Empathy on Apple Podcasts! Trigger warning: sexual assault and eating disorders mentioned in this episode.

On Episode 117 of You, Me, Empathy, Liz Shannon Miller and I explore the anxiety wrapped up in deadlines, the life of a freelance writer, movies as empathy machines, and representations of mental illness in media. Follow You, Me, Empathy on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Leave a review in Apple Podcasts. The Feely Human Collective is crowdfunding! Final week!

On Episode 116 of You, Me, Empathy, Dene Logan Selkin and I explore sobriety, wanting to fit in when you feel left out, mental health and therapy stigma in the African American community, and allowing ourselves to feel our feelings. Want to help me make the world more feely? Follow You, Me, Empathy on Instagram and Twitter. Follow Feely Human on Instagram and Twitter. Full show notes here!

On Episode 115 of You, Me, Empathy, Brianna Pastor and I explore that beautiful moment when we find community (our people!), internalized trauma, coming out as gay in a Jehovah’s Witness home, and healing through poetry. Support The Feely Human Collective!

On Episode 114 of You, Me, Empathy, Mike Vinopal and I explore suppressing emotions, why mental illness stigma silences, and the proactive suicide prevention organization, Hope For the Day. Support The Feely Human Collective!

On Episode 113 of You, Me, Empathy, Katie Huey and I explore saying yes to the things we actually want to say yes to, moving through the world at our own pace, why grief isn’t contagious, and how Katie is looking for beauty amid the pain. Thanks for listening and thanks for empathizing with us! Want to make the world more feely? Support Feely Human on Indiegogo today! Full show notes and all links mentioned in the episode here. Follow You, Me, Empathy on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Support You, Me, Empathy on Patreon. Subscribe and leave a review in Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or Google. Get yourself a feely t-shirt, mug, or tote!