Being Jim Davis

This isn't strictly relevant to the podcast, but there's a chipmunk hiding in our basement. How do I get this chipmunk out of our basement?How'd that chipmunk get in your house, Chris? you may ask.Well, since you're curious, our cat Louie brought it in this morning before my wife left for work. He caught it somewhere out in the back courtyard and brought it in through the screen door, which the main back door was open because it was nice out and the screen door was closed but it has a big ol' hole in it so the animals can proceed in and out at their leisure. So he comes in with this chipmunk and he lets it loose it on the floor to play with and/or torture to death, and the damn thing gets away from him and runs down the stairs into the basement. So at that point, bedlam erupts. Louie takes off after the chipmunk, and so does George (our dog, a dachshund/beagle mix), and they're all like barking and hissing and yipping and just freaking the fuck out to high heaven. Meanwhile, the poor chipmunk -- who for

Like yesterday's, today's episode of Being Jim Davis is short and sweet, without the standard whimsical links and videos even.Today's strip

Hey there Being Jim Davis listeners. Christopher Winter here. As you may know, my standard editing practice has been never to cut out any material. Never. If we took the time to say it, you should take the time to listen to it. That's my attitude.Or anyway, it was my attitude. But you have to keep it fresh in this business, so let's try something new for BJD's fourth century. Today, I'm cutting out the drinks roundup, I'm cutting out the delay while I turned off my washing machine and then the delay after that while Jon turned off his air conditioner and then the delay after that while Jon called up the week's strips on his browser. I'm cutting out all kinds of garbage, everything even borderline irrelevant. I'm cutting until it hurts. I'm cutting like I'm a Republican legislator and Being Jim Davis is a vital social service upon which millions of the most vulnerable depend. I'm slashing your mother's Medicaid, evicting her from her nursing home, and sending the proceeds to the richest 400 hous

And now, a palette cleanser!   I hope you all enjoyed watching every single one of those Star Wars videos. For those of you who boycotted the podcast the week up to this point you've rejoined us just in time to catch one of us confusing the landmark Supreme Court case Loving v. Virginia with a non existent town in Virginia named "Loving". You'll have to listen to find out which one of us it was.Today we bid a fond farewell to this week's special guest host, the immortal Alex D'Arata-Wolfe. If you'd like to follow him on twitter, there's nothing we can do to stop you.#Easter I guess.John Cage's RoaratorioToday's strip

Since it's our 300th episode, y'all are getting a fuckton of these today:                     https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNGH-LYEBMohttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ep98a0mDiIchttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTrxDBDBOHUhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9bD4ZtxfMghttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GQhKBn42XcUhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9Ov80xgIZohttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pbaXWj75xUIt is, in fact, a Garfield.Today's strip

Seriously, there are a LOT of these things.   Today's Garfield shows a surprising non-disregard for accuracy in its cultural references. This podcast, on the other hand, shows nothing but contempt for accuracy of any kind. Today's strip

Ok, here's your Star Wars thing. It's probably obliquely related to today's Garfield strip in some ingenious way.   Yeah, I know. The lego one was better.Today's strip

You might have heard a nasty rumor going around on social media about us misspelling the name of this week's special guest host, Alex D'Arata-Wolfe. It is FALSE; the clear implication that we ever made any attempt to spell it the correct way is scurrilous and insulting. Anyway, here's a Garfield, and here's another one of these things.   And here's the very first hit on Google when you search for that totally random binary number I made up as a hashtag. I do not understand what it is.   Obviously it goes without saying that what Chris said about the concept of Atari in Go was humorously inaccurate.Today's incidental music continues to be "Zeros Beardos," from the album Too Cold; Car Won't Start by The Flowers of Disgust, appears courtesy of The Flowers of Disgust and Cat O' Nine Tails Records. I lied when I said it would be that other song again.MIT SCIgen hoaxToday's strip

Yes, it's going to be a real great week. I mean, just look at some of this stuff! Why would somebody make that? Who was their intended audience, and what does its existence say about the human species?   Anyway, I think Chris forgot to mention in yesterday's podcast description I wrote that we have a guest host this week! In the form of some guy name Alex D'Arata-Wolfe! So that's cool. I wonder if he says anything insightful in this episode? THERE'S ONLY FUCKING ONE WAY TO FIND OUT PEOPLE COME ONToday's incidental music, "Zeros Beardos," from the album Too Cold; Car Won't Start by The Flowers of Disgust, appears courtesy of The Flowers of Disgust and Cat O' Nine Tails Records. I know, right? Sorry, just trying to mix things up a little. We'll go back to that other song tomorrow I'm sure.Today's strip

    Welcome to a new week! This week's theme is weird Star Wars shit on YouTube. Here you go.   Today's strip

Today is Sunday, which means it's the last episode I have to edit. Until all the other, future episodes I have to edit: a never-ending stream of Garfields flowing unceasingly into infinity. Ugh. Anyway, here's this:Today's strip

In today's episode of Being Jim Davis we something something something. Or whatever.Today's strip

We kick off today's episode with some wild and baseless speculation about how eighteenth century British philosopher David Hume would have regarded the difference between Count Duckula and non-Count Quackula. It's pretty much downhill from there. Today's strip

Today's Garfield is another Jim Davis riff on Spring and Springtime. I guess I should probably embed a performance of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring or something like that. But instead, here's more Fats Waller. God, I love Fats Waller. People treat him like a novelty act, but he's just so fucking good. So so so so fucking good.Today's strip

Jon didn't want to talk with me about The Three-Body Problem, that Chinese Science Fiction novel everyone's talking about. I guess because he's an uncultured boob. You know who did read The Three-Body Problem? President Barack Obama, that's who! Maybe I should see if he wants to team up on a Hagar the Horrible podcast or something...Anyway, here's a better recording of Fats Waller's "Your Feet's Too Big," set to a cartoon for some reason.Today's strip

Well, look, I'm not going to embed photos from my feet-only Instagram account all week. And I'm certainly not going to sit here and write out a summary of what happens in today's episode. I mean, who even remembers?So here's a video of Fats Waller performing his classic song "Your Feet's Too Big." It is, honestly, not his best ever recording of this number, but it's a pretty entertaining clip nonetheless.Today's strip

So recently a lot of people have written in to say that they would really like to subscribe to my Instagram account where I only post pictures of my feet, but what with work and family all the recent surprising and dramatic political developments, they just haven't been able to find the time. Well, listeners, fear not! Here's a sampler: A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on May 15, 2017 at 8:21pm PDT A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on May 18, 2017 at 1:40pm PDT A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on May 31, 2017 at 7:54pm PDT Sun's out, toes out. A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on Jun 9, 2017 at 5:12pm PDT Today's strip

Thank you for downloading Being Thomas Jefferson, the world's ONLY daily podcast dedicated to the Lazy Susan. On today's episode, we'll continue our analysis of the renaissance in LS style and design that occurred in the mid-1950s following technological innovations developed by engineer and soy-sauce magnate George Hall. Of particular interest in our discussion will be the ensuing impact on the San Fransisco-area Chinese restaurant industry.Then, we'll be airing part two of our exciting seven-part interview with Professor Mike Huggins from the University of Cumbria regarding the varied sociological implications of Lazy Susan integration with Scrabble and other board-based leisure activities both at home and abroad.Finally we'll wrap things up with yet another installment of our popular quiz segment "What Goes Around...?" where we each take turns trying to guess the specific model Lazy Susan the other is currently spinning based only on a series of yes or no questions.You won't want to miss this one; it'

Calmly we walk through this April’s day,   Metropolitan poetry here and there,   In the park sit pauper and rentier,   The screaming children, the motor-car   Fugitive about us, running away,   Between the worker and the millionaire   Number provides all distances,   It is Nineteen Thirty-Seven now,   Many great dears are taken away,   What will become of you and me (This is the school in which we learn ...)   Besides the photo and the memory? (... that time is the fire in which we burn.) (This is the school in which we learn ...)   What is the self amid this blaze? What am I now that I was then Which I shall suffer and act again, The theodicy I wrote in my high school days   Restored all life from infancy, The children shouting are bright as they run   (This is the school in which they learn ...)   Ravished entirely in their passing play! (.

Boy, you talk about a clever disguise; that isn't Jon Arbuckle after all. It's Connie Chung!Here's another Star Trek thing that exists for some reason. Today's stripDr. Sparkle's Day by Day blog