Podtoid: Destructoid's Video Game Podcast

On this week's Podtoid, we're forced to talk about videogames because Jim didn't come up with any half-baked ideas. Nevertheless, we still get to enjoy Jonathan's new Kickstarter idea in which our intrepid hosts will bump their bare butts together for an egregious sum of money. Also, brain parties!  Earthbound gets talked about, as does Mercenary Kings. We chat about the feud between Phil Fish and Kevin Dent, while also basking in the glow that is Tonetta. Yay Podtoid!

It's a shorter Podtoid this week, but we pack a lot of those ca-RAZY belly laffs into the party. We get not one, but TWO Gordon Ramsay television pitches. We get not one, but TWO Willem Dafoe movie pitches. We get to hear about how Jonathan Holmes saved a man from jail. We get to hear criticism of the 1985 Transformers movie far too long after the fact. We get to hear about fans sending in dick pics. It's amazing! There's also some chat regarding Dynasty Warriors 8, and why the ladies love themselves some Sengoku Basara. Oh God, it's ALL TOO GOOD!

On this week's almighty Podtoid, the Matt Borealis saga reaches its ghastly conclusion, Eliza Dushku plans to go see Pacific Rim with a Cherry Coke, and chickens are eaten for terrifying purposes. Also, Jonathan Holmes begins the arduous and arcane process of becoming an eternal lich.  Elsewhere, we chat about Smash Bros. and Evo, as well as the Wii U's attempts to gain relevance, and Nintendo's fight against importing. Oh what FUNNY FUN FUN!

On this week's majestic Podtoid, Jonathan Holmes becomes the new face of Hollywood by starring in a V for Vendetta sequel AND appearing as spunky ghosts in horror films. Jim reboots He-Man and the Masters of the Universe, while Bono Vox joins the fight to get David Boreanaz to become Matt Borealis. As if that wasn't enough (and it is), the gang chats about Zelda being playable in more games, Microsoft's potential future Xbox head, and Double Fine being silly with money. So much fun!

On this week's majestic Podtoid, Jonathan Holmes stars in the new hit TV series Soda Baby, we discuss the increasingly controversial David Boreanaz/Matt Borealis situation, and Willem Dafoe offers his hexed penis in the name of medical healing. It's a wonderful thing.  Elsewhere, we bag on Ride to Hell: Retribution, discuss the Ouya, and chat a bit about Animal Crossing. All this and more, only on Podtoid!

This week's Podtoid is naturally led by the megaton announcement of Microsoft's Xbox One DRM removal policies. Be amazed at how we can talk about it without getting all smug! There's also plenty of obligatory post-E3 talk, and the all-important plan to crown Jonathan Holmes the king of the expo. Elsewhere, the Pikmin do a secret naughty on Jonathan's body.  There's also talk of Yaiba: Ninja Gaiden Z, Killer Is Dead, Metal Gear Solid 5, and so much bloody more!

On this week's Podtoid, Jonathan Holmes finally stands trial for perverse rebellion, Gordon Ramsay becomes the Kitchen Gladiator, and the gang discusses censoring itself for network television. Elsewhere, Holmes muses on penis aging, and then becomes a medieval apothecary to cure Olde Boston Towne.  Of course, we couldn't not discuss The Last of Us, and touch upon Animal Crossing: New Leaf. All that and more awaits thee! 

Jonathan Holmes has very real butt trouble in this week's episode, but that doesn't mean he gets it gently. Instead, Dr. Sterling uses his poopology degree to try and diagnose the problem, before Holmes is whisked away to be the living prisoner of an underground time capsule, where he shall know a new god. Elsewhere, the gang gets caught up reading some of the most horrific sounding sex game descriptions. It's really horrible.  Also, Xbox One gets talked about a little more, a choice is made between Magneto and Anita Sarkeesian, and something about Fire Emblem. 

On this week's UNITED Podtoid, the gang celebrates and praises the announcement of the Xbox One. Only joking! It's tormented and mocked and stretched cruelly upon the Lust Gurney. Microsoft discussion dominates a lot of the chat, but there's time to discuss Jonathan Holmes' transformation into Street Fighter's favorite anti-terrorist mutant, and there's even a brand new Willem Dafoe movie pitch!  Elsewhere, there's a bit of talk about indie games, polygons, and voice actors. What fun!

On this week's very steamy episode, Sterling becomes acquainted with Belladonna's Bitch Fist, a man in hospital demands to know where his foreskin is, and Gordon Ramsay rescues a restaurant with the power of a big ol' dildo.  As if that wasn't enough, the gang also chats up a storm about sexy Hawken posters, and Namco Bandai's questionable marketing decisions with Dark Souls 2. All that and more, only on Podtoid!

On this week's juicy edition of Podtoid, Jonathan Holmes is in line to become a warrior of bone and a lord of flies. Gordon Ramsay tells lies and betrays those who rely upon him. Country music gets the taste of semen it has craved for so long. Also, flans.  Elsewhere, there's chat about Penny Arcade and its latest wacky Kickstarter shenanigans, Dr. Love is in session, and some videogame things of stuff!

On this week's suggestive Podtoid, the gang chats about Bailey Jay, essing a mean dee, and the discomfort that comes from saying certain damp words. Jonathan Holmes also becomes head chef at a brand new restaurant, The Dicfriends is the hottest new kid's TV show, and we unveil a brand new feature -- TV Pitches for Gordon Ramsay. At one point, a videogame is mentioned, as is Dungeons & Dragons. So that's enough gaming content.  

On this week's Podtoid, Jonathan Holmes ushers in the New Holy Roman Empire with the aid of deadly plants, Telly Salavas is given an overdue celebration, and two men have sex because of a necklace filled with blood.  Elsewhere, we chat about Iwata becoming CEO of Nintendo America, we discuss the tarnished glory of Zool and Cool Spot, and there's some chat about whatever crap Microsoft's gonna shove down our faces on May 21. All this and more, only on Podtoid!

On this week's show, Jonathan Holmes eats cake while a man poses nude for his amusement, Jim Sterling becomes an alchemist with an anal cauldron, and Conrad Zimmerman gets nasty on Nintendo. Elsewhere, Willem Dafoe is a lazy comedian as well as a fried food devil, and Simon LeBon proves himself almost as problematic as Trent Reznor. His thinks the ocean is poisoned by the liberals! As if that wasn't enough, we have talk about the Link to the Past sequel, Earthbound, Grasshopper Manufacture and many other things! Oh Christ, it's so acceptable!

Jim's sick this week, and there's only one cure -- Dr. Holmes' special chicken soup! Elsewhere, we talk about the passing of smelly Margaret Thatcher, we chat about BioShock Infinite's successes and failures, but mostly talk about semen. Lots and lots of talking about it. With a little bit of hardcore pornography.  Also, Windows 8, the PS Vita's indie love, and jizz. 

Conrad's back! The Charmed Ones are in full effect to talk about Conrad's new house, as well as Jim's similarities to Garth Marenghi. Elsehwere, Jonathan Holmes both stars in a sexy rock opera and becomes mayor of Fellatio Town, and the gang talks over some of the most notable game industry April Fool jokes.  As if that wasn't enough, we reminisce about LucasArts games, talk about interesting PC titles such as Evoland, discuss an aborted Willem Dafoe movie pitch, AND deal with Trent Reznor's "hilariously" ironic texts. That fiend. 

Conrad is moving house, so Jon and Jim hold the fort to give us a Podtoid about PAX East, human turds, and an erotic new take on The DuckTales game. As if that wasn't enough, there's some hot chat on secret societies, and why Jonathan should become The Predator.  We also unveil JonCon East and its Tuna Boxing competition, Trent Reznor resurrects a tired meme, and The Walking Dead: Survival Instinct isn't very good. Also, Dive Kick! 

On this week's protesting Podtoid, the crew laments having to record a show on time due to people insisting things be organized, Elizabeth Berkley is absolutely perfect, and Jonathan Holmes hosts a butt auction. As usual, Trent Reznor is up to his old tricks, and there's a moment of revelation as cum tributes threaten the peace.  Elsewhere, there's some talk about The Walking Dead: Survival Instinct, PAX East violence, and some game from the Katamari people that Jonathan's in love with. 

On this week's Popetoid, the gang tries its hand at hilarious topical humor ... and naturally fails. Jonathan Holmes also becomes not one, but TWO professional wrestlers, and learns the ancient art of cum tributes. As if that wasn't enough, Trent Reznor lies in wait with a peanut taunt, and someone stole fizzy lifting drink.  As far as game talk goes, there's chat about Don't Starve, Ridiculous Fishing, and some minor teases about Lego City Undercover. Wow, what a show! 

It's a laid back episode this week. People are tired, stressed, but keen to talk shop! Sim City gets the savaging it deserves, while Trent Reznor's up to his ol' texting tricks. Elsewhere, Jim's ludicrous PC problems are fully detailed, and there's a debate over the merits of testicles.  So here's your Podtoid that you kept bloody asking for! Eat it up.