Horror Movie Night

The moon is full, the carnival's in town and the preacher's daughter is searching for a fuzzy sock - but wait! What's that? Werewolves just aren't cutting it on their own anymore...we need to add freaks to the mix! And how about a vampire too, why the hell not? In case this doesn't ring any bells, there are a TON of Howling movies in the franchise, and we're discussing Howling 6: The Freaks (1991) this week. We really love werewolves on this show, and because of this, we completely eviscerate this low-effort attempt at prolonging the life of an already mediocre franchise. Come check out this tent we pitched, it's got tons of gross stuff to look at inside, including but not limited to a geek, a bearded lady, and a guy with really bad eczema, so don't forget the skin cream for this episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We try to stay up on all trends on this show, so this week we don some streetwear, stupid sunglasses and listen exclusively to Outrun music - HMN has gone full vaporwave aesthetic and we're talking the Charlie Sheen/Clint Howard Knightrider worship flick THE WRAITH (1986)! This movie is hot garbage, and has a serious cult following we just. don't. get. The car doesn't even look sweet! Or talk! But we can imagine the mountains of coke that brought this film to life, and we respect that. So take a bump on this back-desert road as we drag race through another episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Horror Movie Night we straight up beat the love of God into our guest co-host Kyle Kuchta while we discuss 1987's American Gothic. The film is ... shockingly damn good. You guys didn't make us suffer (yet) for the first listener submitted film of 2018. So join us in examining what can happen when you decide to take a 2nd honeymoon with your obnoxious friends to help your wife get over murdering your child. Spoiler Alert... it goes badly this week on HORROR MOVIE NIGHT Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a Bonus Episode Matt and Scott sit down with Jon Schnitzer who directed and Produced the documentary "Haunters: The Art of the Scare" which is currently streaming on Netflix. https://www.netflix.com/title/80213401 Check them out on Social Media: Website: http://www.hauntersmovie.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hauntersthemovie Twitter: https://twitter.com/HAUNTERS_Movie Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hauntersthemovie/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As is tradition here at Horror Movie Night, we're kicking off the new year with a listener poll-chosen, somewhat-non-horror flick, and this time around, we're talking live-action anime rubber suit monster battles with 1991's The Guyver! Don't let the VHS box art fool you - Mark Hamill is NOT the titular character, or even on screen enough to warrant his face on the cover, but this was released at the cusp of the 90s, a time when everyone was trying to squeeze every last drop out of the withering Star Wars franchise. It's actually a selling point that Mark takes backseat to Screaming Mad George's rubber suit/practical effects obsession, and we get 6" kaiju duking it out with no energy weapons in sight (probably not enough budget for post work, oh well). It's 2018, let's get S U P E R K A W A I I together on this week's episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's New Years Evil so let's reflect on the best podcasting moment of Scott and Matt's life... pissing off a room of con attendees as we ruin everything they grew up loving one thing at a time. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There are so few New Years horror movies that you really only have a handful of options, so this year we went with the one that arguably had the best cover art, 1987's bizarre Bloody New Year! If you ever wondered what a full length Twilight Zone movie with the budget of a single episode and a disco ball full of high-grade coke would look like, then look no further. This film has a science experiment gone awry, 50s time warp (replete with sexy stockings...what? Don't look at me like that) and more loose ends than an old rug. So basically, perfect fodder for our show. Get your seams straight and join the part for the last Horror Movie Night episode of 2017! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

As a child, did you ever grab a present from under the tree on Christmas morning, shake it and think, "oh sweet, the Ninja Turtles skateboard I wanted!" only the unwrap it and find yourself staring at a year's worth of socks? We imagine that's how you're feeling as you realize we're talking the Black Christmas remake from 2006 and not the original from 1974. Hashtag sorrynotsorry bitches, because this version, also known as Black Xmas, is unfairly hated, and is actually a pretty solid mid-2000s slasher. Its creators really wanted to see how many attractive 25 year olds they could cast as sorority sisters and how much eye trauma they could cram into 90 minutes. The answer to both questions is (thankfully) A LOT. Spike the eggnog and roast those human skin gingerbread cookies extra crispy, then cozy up with us next to your favorite disembodied Midwest podcast voices on this Christmas episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you ever felt that Horror Movie Night wasn't Philly enough, we've decided to bring you some hard-hitting holiday horror from the cradle of the US government, and boy is it an experience! After years of coaxing, Matt has finally allowed a discussion dedicated to Miss December (aka Calendar Girl) from 2011, and it went better than expected; he's friends with the producer and didn't want to hurt his feelings if our discussion went south... Lucky for all involved, this relatively unknown killer Christmas flick is a blast to watch and discuss, and you need to watch it on Amazon Prime instead of (or in addition to) Elves. Hope you're as into unbearable goth manic pixie dream girls as we are, cuz they're crashing the party and already drunk on this week's Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In our ongoing series "Films That Really Shouldn't Have Had Sequels," we head to the graveyard with a cast of very familiar faces saying very familiar lines which were definitely funnier the first time around. That's right, we're talking Return of the Living Dead Part II from 1988! If you're looking for the charm and entertainment value of the original ROTLD, you won't find it here, only the mouldering corpse of it, stammering out terrible lines in weird souther aw-heck accents for no apparent reason. We're all the worse for having suffered through this one, so share our pain (the pain of being dead!) on this week's episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's truly amazing that, for how much we bring up Chuckie Band and the Puppet Master series, we have never done an actual HMN episode on any of them... But that changes today. Today, we give up our brain matter to the godking Toulon. Today, we let Pinhead's little hands squeeze the life from our throats. Today, we discuss Puppet Master II: His Unholy Creations from 1990! There are improbable puppet murders left and right, as well as some pretty satisfying child bbq if we're being honest with ourselves. Whistle the Puppet Master theme song with us as we bask in the glory on this week's episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's the day after Thanksgiving and everyone is feeling fat and terrible from all of yesterday's overindulgence, so fire up the boombox, pull on your loudest spandex onesie and let's sweat the evil out with 1987's Killer Workout (aka Aerobicide)! Scott counts the gratuitous dance sequences (with time stamps, you're welcome), Matt feels the burn, and Adam picks the most ridiculous slasher weapon ever. It's a wonder there was any coke left on Earth after the filming of Killer Workout, and if you haven't watched this one yet, you'll understand soon enough. Build your own dadbod with us this week on Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Another Bonus Episode from Scott and Matt's appearance at the tanoshicon in West Chester circa 2015. In this episode we attempt to rank all the major slasher franchise films from best to worst. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Travel back in time with us, dear listener, as we return to the glory of the early 90s, when bowl haircuts were cool, acid wash was a new technology, and Edward Furlong's career was blossoming. You may be disappointed to hear that, no, we're not discussing Terminator 2, but rather the sequel no one wanted, 1992's Pet Sematary 2! Our resident Irishman picks the only horror movie to ever prominently feature death by potatoes, so some jokes really just write themselves. Come with us as we venture up to the old Indian burial grounds with the corpse of Stephen King's pride on this week's episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What's worse than watching Body Melt and Street Trash for your podcast? One might think "watching another melt movie" is the answer, but it's actually "watching another melt movie twice in one week because you didn't realize it was going to be picked for the podcast and you already watched it after watching Street Trash," which is just what Scott did with this week's pick - 1977's notoriously goofy The Incredible Melting Man! The plot is murkier than all the vanilla pudding used to make the effects in this film, but the guys muddle through as always. Come see the rings of Saturn with us and maybe we'll even catch a glimpse of Uranus while we're at it on another episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Adam is MIA so Scott and Matt are forced to tackle John Carpenter's end of the world obsession on our own. We discuss 1987's Prince of Darkness until one of us ends up trapped in a mirror world with Alice Cooper and the Devil. You can only know which one of us gets sacrificed by listening to this week's Horror Movie Night Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's Halloween, ya mutants! That means only one thing - it's time for HMN's annual "Celebrate Halloween By Discussing Mediocre Childrens' Shows" bonus episode featuring the very first episode of Nickelodeon's Are You Afraid of the Dark? Last Halloween's discussion of Goosebumps S1E1 was a low bar to clear, so... you're welcome, AYAOTD. We talk critically about toxic masculinity in brother-brother relationships and the likelihood that there were 40 years of children parading through the woods who couldn't figure out a stupid riddle. All that and more on this special Halloween episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're on the cusp of Halloween Weekend 2k17, kids, so we scrounged up a truly terrifying tale of thaumiel trickery to assail your aural appendices, a story of one child's harrowing nightly encounters with Howie Mandel in his bedroom. That's right, we're talking 1989's Little Monsters! This isn't a good movie, but really, we don't associate ourselves with those kinds of movies anyway, and Howie's cocaine freakout performance pretty much fits right into our wheelhouse. Thrill to scenes of Mr. Mandel tempting fate to explode his heart and a child drink urine. It's all here on this Halloweekend episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Life was simpler in the 80s; kids only wanted to dress up as one of 3 things for Halloween: a witch, a skeleton, or a jack-o-lantern. Men were men, drinking from flasks while doing doctor things, or while driving, or while seducing the daughters of dead guys they're investigating, or while Irish warlocks with British accents use Stonehenge dust to turn every costume into a murder death ray party in order to sacrifice America's children to the old gods. Or whatever. You get the idea, we're talking 1983's Halloween III: Season of the Witch for week 3 of our month-long Halloween celebration! There's no Michael Myers to stalk us, but thankfully Tom Adkins steps in to fill the creepiness factor with his thirst for liquor and vulnerable young women. Join us as we incessantly mumble the Silver Shamrock song until mid-November because dammit that song is like brain herpes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Someone doused our shriveled black hearts in hooker blood and we're back from the grave for another week of Halloween celebration with the sequel (sort of) to Demon Knight - 1996's surprisingly unsexy Tales From the Crypt: Bordello of Blood! Matt has been hyped to pick this for years, but like any Tinder date involving Corey Feldman, expectation outweighs execution. The only thing in this episode that ISN'T flaccid is the conversation, so fill your pocket with rubbers, eat your veggies (vampires really hate vegetarians) and hang out with your fangs out enjoying another episode of Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices