Illogical Contraption: Nights After Dark

Welcome to NAD Episode 51, featuring an array of diverse and stimulating topics such as: How Does A Rainbow Go? / What A Cat Saw / Expounding The Interdimensional Hypothesis / Grey Alien Sex Majick Rituals / Describin’ Gnostic Reptilians / Carl Jung on UFOs / Mini-Bilderberg / The New World Order Commemorative Glock / Earthquake Chat / Name Dropping Moloch / This Chick Is Going Down 

Dad-Chat HEATS UP in Episode 3: STARING THROUGH THE EYES OF THE DAD!In this month's installment, Aesop and Shelby are joined by their bestest pal and bandmate Marissa Martinez-Hoadley (Cretin, Repulsion) to make an attempt at not talking about dicks for 90 minutes. Topics include (but are not limited to): A Brief Celebration of the 100th Anniversary of The Elephant Pajama Joke, Psyllium Husk: Dietary Supplement or Prog Band?, Thawing Out The Blue Grape Neanderthal, How We're All Slowly Dying, Metamucinex/Stool-Aid/Shit Knit (Poop Tips with Grampa Dekker), Steve Vai-able Guitarists, Poseballs and How They Apply To Online Fuckstyles, Rihanna Chat, Scissoring Over Star Trek: TNG, The Guy From Obituary's Meth Lab, Brian Playing Frogger, Aesop's Staunch Anti-Immigrant Stance, DADS DON'T GRAVITY BLAST, A 4-Person Mosh Pit In a Fancy Penthouse Apartment, Nuclear Centaur Cock, Fucked With A Porsche, A Garfield Greeting Card Containing an Applebee's Gift Certificate and a Message Reading: "Hey Mom, I'm Transgendered!"

Fifty Episodes! Wha Happened? In this one:  Squatchin’ Or Skinwalkin’? / Interdimensional Cryptoids / Biggest Ba’als Of Them All / Psychic Bob And The Hathors / Cleophus Brown Sees A UFO  / Weird Mortuary Rites Of George Bush Sr. / Disney Magic Shuts The Door

Truther Jams! Human Mutilatiions! Rock Bands Down The Rabbit Hole! Describin’ Memes: Funny Club Edition! Republican Initiation Rites! Illuminated Shakespeare! SO MUCH TRUTH YOU CAN'T HANDLE IT! 

Describin’ Mutilations! An Amazing True Case of a Mutilated Cow! We Visit the Scene of an Actual Mutilation! Edgar Mitchell’s Psychic Experiments From Outer Space! Sarah Hangs Out With Real Pilots and Gets Real UFO Stories! THIS ONE GOES DEEP.

In this chapter, the beautiful and talented Mike Scheidt (Yob, Vhol) joins Shelby and Aesop LIVE at the Phallus Palace to discuss various and sundry topics, including (but not limited to): Openly Weeping Over Star Trek TNG, A Table For One At Denny's And The Resulting Food Sadness, Train Sounds, Penis Metal, Sharkfuckin'/Fast As A Shark (Depending On The Specific Shark And Type of Transportation Involved), Wesley Grindcrusher, Elephant Walrus Mating Season, More Train Sounds, Glen Benton Shampooing His Hair In The Ladies' Room, Steve Asheim's Insurance Seminar/Doing Donuts In A Hummer In The Parking Lot Behind The Venue, A Goat Semen Shirt at The PTA Meeting, Captain Picard's Pennywhistle, Four Frowny Bald Tough Dudes And A Jazz Dad, JESUS even MORE Train Sounds?, Visigoth Baking Hudson's Melon, Aesop Having Sex With A Horribly Disfigured Freak, Mike Getting Dimebagged, Deicide Mondegreens, The Cocoa-Demon, Fucking Your Friends' Moms, Fish Nipples, and of course, everyone's favorite segment Fatherly Advice. F

We go straight down the rabbit hole on the Scalia death, trace out the entire occult history of the participants, and emerge with a STARTLING NEW REVELATION that connects shit in a way that will (hopefully) blow your mind! Or just keep jerking off and watching wrestling, I don't care. 

Magickal Online Seminars! The Pick Up Magician! Pick Up Dads! Furry Perversions! Hashtag Stay Woke Shit! Trump Knows 9/11! Is There Really A Book Of Secrets? Space Music! Shaded Half Of The Satellite! Reviews Of Shows And Movies! Lucifer At The Superbowl! 

It's the much anticipated debut of Illogical Contraption's newest unneccesary spinoff, DEATH METAL DADS!  In this pilot episode, your intrepid hosts Shelby and Aesop discuss Dadness, Sadness, Madness, Death Metal Addiction, Valentine's Day, Natural Purple Watermelon Flavor, Morbid Angel, and Floridian Rednecks, all the while floating on a bromantic cloud of Lick Me All Over incense. 

Wow! The Popobawa! Celebrity Clones! DNA Activation! A Brand New Cult! Lisa Frank and Her Coke Problem! Wow!

Join your weird conspiracy friends at IllCon for an “illuminating” in-depth discussion of Planet Nibiru and the Annunaki. Spoiler: it was aliens.

Come relax with your pals Cory and Erik while we shoot the breeze about sketchy hotels, frozen heads, Bowie conspiracies, Nibiru and the Anunnaki, the Kaballah, Greys, the Beach Boys, and other chill topics. It’s the Jackie Brown of podcasts!

A Very Special Episode guest starring Jason Frisbie from Pool Party Radio and Shelby Cobras from some stupid show. Listen for magical surprises and mega laffs!

GODDAMN IT PEOPLE N.A.D. IS BACK AND HOTTER THAN EVERRR Supreme Chuckles / Shut Up I’m Still Talking / This Is Ford Country / Fogle's Palace / You Be The Judge / Al Sizzler / Video Game Cover Songs Before They Were Cool / Morning Show Boot Camp / Armenian Lamb Sacrifices

Live From The Sea Of Tranquility / Fake Moon Landing Chat / Apollo 13 Ritual Chat / Nazis on the Moon / Hollow Moon Theory / Soul Trap Moon / Tranquility Lodge 2000

Basically Worse Than Anti-Semetism / Magickal Hollywood J.O. Rituals / Joe Rogan & Ari Shaffir vs. Bill Hicks / If You See Something, Say Something / Broken Dolls That Say Satanic Shit

IllCon Low Lights! Describin’ Memes 3: Describin’ Condoms! Occult Gains At The Gym! The Young Investigator’s Guide To Ancient Aliens! Man Bums! Occult Star Wars Shit! A New Genre Of Dude! Travis Walton Addendum! Christians Debunking Mormonism! Weird Grating Sounds In The Sky! 

Guest Starring Charles The Heckler! Were the Paris attacks predicted by occult numerology? Does a bold new theory of human hybridization explain scandalous events at the highest levels of British government? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!  

We go hard on the Travis Walton abduction! New audio recordings! New evidence revealed! Alien torture porn! This is a good one.

Halloweed Holocast Post Show Wrap Up / Tales Of New San Francisco / Down In The Dark For 69 Days With Antonio Banderas / Tupac Alive In Serbia? / Lil’ Ween / Describin’ Memes: Trump Meme Extravaganza / Astrological Charts Of The Political Elite / Living In The Cheese Dimension