Thank You Heartbreak

In 2017, Cal-Rugby player Robert Paylor started the NCAA National Championship game as a sports star and left on a stretcher, a quadriplegic. His future was grim, his identity taken in an instant. Today he talks about death waiting for him to quit and the mission he’s on to walk again, the universal experience of paralysis, dark nights with his thoughts, and the staying power of accountability. He gets real about his hardest heartbreak — losing his identity,  the times he’d see himself in the mirror and feel pity, and the pride that he’s been able to reclaim through the experience of romantic love. Robert Paylor:Website: https://www.robertpaylor.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/rob.paylorFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/robertpaylor5LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robert-paylorEmail: rob@robertpaylor.comChelsea Leigh Trescott:Website: *undergoing facelift*Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreakFacebook:  https://www.facebook.com/musingsEmail: chelsea@breakupward.com

Comedian, Podcast Host of Future Role Model, and CEO/Founder of My Breakup Registry, a community-driven platform that allows people to crowdfund their break-up or divorce and more, Natasha Pearl Hansen joins Chelsea 6 minutes in to talk about the choices leading up to calling off her wedding and deciding to record and self-produce her first comedy special titled “I Was Supposed To Get Married Today…” (Amazon Prime Video) at the venue instead, how dropping her ego and walking away from the “showy stuff” in the midst of heartbreak helped her figure out the most important question, what am I feeling?, and truly change, how her experience in therapy combined with being in a conscious relationship became a masterclass in knowing yourself, and what it feels like to learn, in your 30s, that the conversations you were having with partners in your 20s weren’t that deep after all.Natasha Pearl HansenWEBSITE: https://www.nphcomedy.comMY BREAKUP REGISTRY: COMEDY SPECIAL via Apple:  "I Was Supposed To Get Married Tod

"As adults, because we’ve experienced pain, a lot of what we go through in life is pain avoidance rather than truly living," Ruchika Lal, the Founder & CEO of Winked!, an app that aims to make adulting joyful, joins Chelsea 8 minutes in to advocate for embracing our inner child,  and with that our whole range of emotions, picking up the lesson and dropping the story, the opportunity in outgrowing ourselves, surrendering to helplessness rather than shunning it, and why the road to warriorhood is paved with feeling it all and letting transitions fill us with wonder.To connect with Ruchika Lal:Winked! via InstagramWinked! via The App StoreWinked! via FacebookWinked! via TwitterTo connect with Chelsea Leigh Trescott:Website: Leave your email at www.breakupward.com to be notified when the site relaunches.Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreakEmail: Breakupward@icloud.com

The Founder of MensGroup.com Sean Galla joins Chelsea 9:30 minutes in and, through his own experiences and the wisdom that came with, is able to nudge her toward a massive wake up call before she falls too deep. Topics touched upon within: the healing balm of approachability, preserving your identity within relationships by honoring personal boundaries, there are no shortcuts towards inner validation, the harmful effect of choosing partners and careers that require us to perform outside of our nature, the anxiety of trying to make everything work in your life so you don’t look like a failure, chasing activities in an effort to avoid feelings, setbacks forcing us to turn off, from Mr. Popular/one of Vancouver’s Most Eligible Bachelors to isolated and sick for four years, losing friends when they can no longer relate to you, filling the void by rushing a relationship, not having the self-worth to say I deserve better than this, patterns come from wounding, the power of pacing in new relationships, the classic a

Author of the memoir Available: A Memoir of Sex & Dating After a Marriage Ends, Laura Friedman Williams opens up about the loneliness of a stay-at-home mother, what her marriage—and life—looked like when she measured it by being happy enough, what it means to no longer be playing the supporting character in her own life, and the sexual liberation following her divorce that set her on a path of self-expression, self-enhancement, and self-sufficiency.——Laura Friedman WilliamsInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurafriedmanwilliamsTwitter: https://twitter.com/laurafwinnycFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/laura.f.williams.90Available: A Memoir of Sex & Dating After a Marriage Ends via AmazonChelsea Leigh TrescottWebsite: www.breakupward.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreakEmail: Chelsea@breakupward.comHuffPo Advice Column: Advice Column

“That’s literally what it is,” today’s guest recording artist Lil Sebby tells Chelsea 57:25 minutes in, "lazy loving. You’re not fully committed. You’re not ready to ride throughout the ups and downs. And there are going to be down times. It’s inevitable. It’s never just going to be perfect. But once it’s not as fun anymore, they dip. They just dip. Ghost culture.”HIGHLIGHTS.2:35 — I don’t even know if I should be comfortable being close to you. I’m just looking at you from a distance. You could have COVID. The trust for a common human being was gone.5:11 — You know how people say, start before you’re ready? The next big shift I need to make is, start before I know. Start before knowing whether it is going to resonate or go in your favor.10:15 — You should never stop because you're not making money. Money is just the cherry on top of the cake. The passion is the cake.15:40 — Late in my twenties, I started to see that there was always something beautiful about everyone I looked at. I realized that mo

A world leader in love, conflict resolution and interpersonal relationships, relationship expert and coach Jayson Gaddis is also the author of Getting To Zero: How to Work Through Conflict in Your High-Stakes Relationships and the podcast host of The Relationship School. He joins Chelsea 17 minutes in to talk about getting closer through conflict, softening our internal critic by finding its stories interesting rather than horrible, the vulnerability of being the learner and the shame of being a man who is scared, the two shitty choices that people frame conflict as and the choice to pursue instead, how the gap between our strategic self and true self creates a core inner conflict, what it means to be a warrior, and why parenting is one of the most confronting experiences in our lives. To connect with Jayson, visit his:Website: www.jaysongaddis.com https://www.jaysongaddis.com/Book: https://www.amazon.com/Getting-Zero-Conflict-High-Stakes-Relationships Podcast: The Relationship School Podcast Coaching: https:

Relationship Dynamics Coach, Educator of Effective Communications Strategies, and Founder of Project Equinox, André Paradis and his wife, dancer, choreographer, and director Nancy Paradis join Chelsea 11:30 minutes in to sound the alarm on toxic masculinity and advocate for ballroom dancing in a world full of disco dancers. Topics explored within this episode: Women being stuck in man mode, the toxic belief that in order to be valuable a woman has to be everything, retaliating against perfectionism and lone wolf syndrome, the ultimate goal for man is freedom, sex too early is a kiss of death, femininity is a superpower, distinguishing boys (weakness) from men (strength), the critic in a woman’s head versus the commentator in a man’s, and why the lemon women have bought about men is making them more miserable than ever before. To connect with André, visit his:Website: ProjectEquinox.netServices:  https://www.projectequinox.net/contactInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/projectequinoxWork with Chelsea: www.bre

Unexpectedly diagnosed with a severe case of Guillain-Barré Syndrome, Chris Maxwell joins Chelsea 5:45 minutes in to talk about having his ego stripped away while he was in the hands of everyone else, letting go of control and prioritizing connection by becoming relational about everything, how trauma is 1000 points of separation and recovery is 1000 points of reconnection, finding his way back to his wife and learning to spiral upward together as patient and caretaker, and why having our eyes raised to the horizon is essential for thriving not only together but separately. To connect with Chris, visit his:Website: https://www.maxwellstrat.comHis wife, Molly Weisgram's Website: https://mollyweisgram.squarespace.comThe memoir based on his and his wife's story: The Other Side of Us: A Memoir of Trauma, Truth, and Transformation

The author of The Other Side of Us: A Memoir of Trauma, Truth, and Transformation and a believer that life is about recovery, not disease, Molly Weisgram joins Chelsea 6:30 minutes in to discuss her husband's unexpected and severe case of Guillain-Barré Syndrome, a dangerous journey that forced the couple into roles as patient and caregiver. She talks about real education being new perspective, holding space for traumatic reverberations, finding your own voice, rejecting victim mentality, and looking at every crisis as an invitation to refine your soul. To connect with Molly, visit her:Website: https://mollyweisgram.squarespace.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mollyweisgramFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorMollyWeisgramTwitter: https://twitter.com/MollyWeisgramThe Other Side of Us via Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Other-Side-Us-Memoir-Transformation

High-Impact Motivational Speaker and author of Blind Ambition Chad E. Foster joins Chelsea 7:30 minutes in to talk about what he did in the aftermath of becoming blind and instantly feeling as though his self-identity was no longer valid. He reveals who he became in the process of relearning how to learn and why holding himself to a standard of discipline, accountability, curiosity, humility, and rarity turned him into a visionary.To connect with Chad, visit his:Website: https://chadefoster.comPurchase his book: Blind Ambition: How to Go from Victim to Visionary Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/FindChadEFosterTwitter: https://twitter.com/ChadEFosterFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/FindChadEFosterWork with Chelsea: www.breakupward.com/shopChelsea’s website: www.breakupward.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreakEmail: Chelsea@breakupward.com

Empowerment Speaker, Activation Coach, and author of Get Your Life Today Desiree Cocroft joins Chelsea 15:30 minutes in to talk about self-acceptance, confidence, direct communication, and decisiveness in dating. Spoiler alert: If you've wondered what adulting in your relationships might really take, this conversation is for you. We discuss shifting away from codependency and into co-creation, why clarifying your intentions in the beginning and communicating your insecurities in the moment is both attractive and a game changer, the desire to be wanted versus needed, how to end the cycle of self-doubt and why, in the midst of rejection, celebrating what went right can increase confidence.To connect with Desiree, visit her:Website: https://www.desireecocroft.comPurchase her book: Get Your Life TodayInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireecocroftFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/getyourlifetodayLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/desireecocroftmbaWork with Chelsea: www.breakupward.com/shopChelsea’s w

Rapper, songwriter, and producer Bafo Joseph aka "Voice of the Underdog" joins Chelsea 22:30 minutes in to talk about the tension of having the girl yet needing the space and time to go all in on oneself. Some may call it selfish or ambitious, enlightened or zoned in with blind faith, but Bafo discusses the hurdle of his long distance relationship and the motivation behind his career in a way that provides clarity surrounding a hot question, "Can one have it all?" He discusses dating to marry, where our love languages come from, his father's take on partnership, his mother's life-enhancing instinct to instill confidence, humility, forgiveness and initiative in him, the pain of divorce and watching your sisters be the one to bond with your father, and how the chip on his shoulder is the need for representation, that is, to not look the other way while his home country of South Sudan is neglected by the world. To connect with Bafo, visit his:Website: https://bafojoseph.comInstagram

Actor Patrick J. Clarke joins 16:30 minutes in to reflect on deleting social media to feel free and returning to it when posting seems like the only way to reach a romantic interest, the false attention, narratives, and expectations that arise from the song and dance of being engaged with online but neglected in person, how to date with an open heart during not only a pandemic but an epidemic of ghosting, and navigating the tiers of vulnerability—when we share, who with, how soon, and is there really such a thing as sharing too much of ourselves, when being embraced for who we really are is the whole point of love?To connect with Patrick, visit his:Insta: http://www.instagram.com/patrickjclarkeWork with Chelsea: www.breakupward.com/shopSite: www.breakupward.comInsta: www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreakEmail: Chelsea@breakupward.comKey Moments:INTRO — (1:20) “The three words that came to me right before I pushed record were: Keep. Me. Honest ... What has kept me away from this mic, away from sharing, away fro

Author of "Relationship. Are you sure you want one?” and leading Facilitator with Access Consciousness, a set of life-changing techniques and tools currently facilitated in more than 175 countries, Simone Milasas joins Chelsea 7:30 minutes in to talk about how you're not wrong if you're single and not right if you're in a relationship, why living in question is a power move (you get to choose!), the 5 elements of intimacy that you must have within yourself before you can develop true intimacy with a partner, how paying her boyfriend for sex was empowering AF, why we would invent a problem within a relationship, what you could choose if you had no judgment, how to treat everything like foreplay, and why we’ve got to choose courage over pride every damn day.To connect with Simone, visit her:Website: https://www.simonemilasas.comThe Choice, Change, and Action PodcastAccess Consciousness: Access Bars Book: Relationship, Are you sure you want one? Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/simonemila

Marriage and Family Therapist and the founder and creator of WeConcile—an affordable online DIY relationship restoration program for couples—Jennifer Lehr, MFT joins Chelsea to talk about love as a creative endeavor, learning to trust the universe while dealing with a major complication, how every fear has a need attached to it, why not feeling safely, and emotionally connected threatens a relationship more than anything, and why finding the one has nothing to do with numbers and everything to do with grace, magic, and synchronicity. To connect with Jennifer, visit her:WeConcile: https://weconcile.comWebsite: https://www.jenniferlehrmft.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/JenniferlehrMFTInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/weconcileWork with Chelsea: www.breakupward.com/shopChelsea’s website: www.breakupward.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreakEmail: Chelsea@breakupward.com

Author of Fear Is Not An Option and Rethink Love: 3 Steps to being the one, attracting the one, and become one, Monica Berg is a self-proclaimed “change junkie.” She talks about why meeting her husband felt more like a thud than a bang, how her father’s nonverbal support and ability to just walk by her side during her eating disorder were some of the most beautiful days, the true definition of authenticity, why we all need to help each other offer our unique strength to this world, and how raising a son with special needs helped her let go of judgment, expectation, and approval and showed her what real love is.To connect with Monica, visit her:Website: RethinkLife.TodayAmazon: Fear Is Not An Option & Rethink LoveInstagram: www.instagram.com/monicaberg74Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/monicaberg74Twitter: https://twitter.com/monicaberg74Work with Chelsea: www.breakupward.com/shopChelsea’s website: www.breakupward.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreakEmail: Chelsea@breakupward.com

Known as the clown, the monkey, the deviant with the Famous Anus and the person at the party who says the uncomfortable truth, comedian and host of the Unmentionable podcast, Jordan Power brings to the mic a rarer side of himself in this episode—one that’s deeper, darker, and a little off brand. It’s the side of himself that he’s always wanted to be loved for—his brain and cerebral take on the world. In episode 205, Jordan opens up about how comedy became a defense mechanism that he’s cleaved to in the darkest moments of his life, a tool that both saves him and makes him a slave to the chuckles. He talks about where his deepest insecurity—being unlovable—and his heaviest fear—that no one will stay—originated, how he lost 20 years of his life as a result of not being able to be open, candid, and shamelessly gay, why he'll no longer be divulging his sex life on his new podcast, and how confronting his own mortality on a regular basis keeps him zoned in and balls out.This conversation is everything that Tha