Talking To Teens

Cynthia Clumeck Muchnick and Jenn Curtis, authors of The Parent Compass, share their wealth of knowledge on the college admissions process and parenting in the late teens.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesLet’s be honest–the pressure of the college application process is enough to drive anyone crazy. Both you and your kids might find yourselves losing sleep and shedding tears over the endless rampage of SAT scores, personal essays and scholarship applications. It’s so intense that celebrities are willing to bribe schools and admissions officers with thousands of dollars just to get their kid’s feet in the door!Although you just want the best for your kid, it’s easy to get caught up in the competition of it all and become another expectant force breathing down their necks. You might find yourself so obsessed with whether or not they get in that you forget to notice all the hard work and character growth they’ve

Dr. Charlan Nemeth, author of In Defense of Troublemakers, shares her decades of research on underdogs and dissenters with Andy. Turns out troublemakers have hidden superpowers that can make them top-notch critical thinkers and persuaders!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesWith so much fake news flying around on social media and the internet becoming more and more politically polarizing each day, it’s easy to be worried about whether or not our teens can think for themselves. On top of online influences, teens are also susceptible to pressure from their peers in real life, who threaten to paint them as outcasts if they hold a minority opinion. With all these forces against us, raising independent thinkers with their own opinions, values, and moral codes is not easy.To make matters even more challenging, psychological studies inform us that humans are fundamentally wired to abandon our own thoughts and observati

Ellen Hendriksen, author of How to Be Yourself, clues us in on what might be triggering your teen’s anxiety and perfectionism--and what you can do to help them overcome those and feel comfortable being themselves!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesThe high school social atmosphere is pretty terrifying. You might remember the feeling of your heart beating against your chest as you asked a table full of kids if you could sit with them, or the way you got tongue tied trying to talk to your crush in the hallway. As stressful as it is, it tends to pass in time as kids mature. For many teens, this is just a part of growing up.But for some, social anxiety is a major challenge that keeps them from finding friends and blossoming into confident adults. Too often, these teens let their social anxiety rule their lives. They flee any kind of challenging social interaction, falling into a pattern of avoidance. They never lea

Dr. Michele Borba, author of Thrivers and Unselfie, offers up research-based ways to help teens thrive. We’ll delve into some of the seven key traits parents can teach their teen to set them up for success.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesWe would do anything for our kids to be successful. That’s why we sign them up for SAT prep classes, make sure they practice piano every day and watch their report cards like hawks. If they can get good test scores they can go to a good college, then get a job with benefits until hopefully they don’t need us at all anymore! So long as we ensure their meeting the marks academically, we’re giving them everything they could ever need...right?Well, not quite. When we look at the research, we find that kids with the highest grades aren’t necessarily the most successful. Those deemed “gifted” don’t always become lawyers and CEOs if they don’t know how to work hard or persevere thr

Dr. Ilyasah Shabazz, author of The Awakening of Malcolm X, joins us for a talk on race, history, and the power of learning. Teaching our teens to live justly starts with a strong family foundation.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesUnless you and your teen live under a rock, your child has probably been exposed to a lot of discourse about racism this past year. Sparked by the killing of George Floyd, the world erupted in protests and outcries for equality this summer–and the world has never been the same.With the video of the tragic murder available online amongst plenty of other intense dialogue about race, you might be wondering how you can talk to your kids about it all. You may feel like you don’t know how to approach the topic, or don’t feel like you can do an adequate job covering the vast history of racial inequality and all of its nuances.If you don’t know where to start, it can be powerful to give your

Cara Natterson, author of Decoding Boys, shares her insights into raising boys--from silent phases, to gaming, to late bloomers, to pornography use, as a pediatrician Cara has seen it all!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesWe think we know how puberty works. Kids grow hair everywhere, wake up 2 feet taller than the night before, and suddenly start wanting to go on dates to the mall without any supervision! But there’s actually a lot to puberty that most parents don’t know about. Did you know, for example, that puberty can begin as early as age seven in some girls? Or that male puberty is almost totally contained to testicular growth for the first few months or even years?If we don’t properly learn about puberty, we can’t teach our kids what they need to know. During this confusing period, teens can use all the help they can get. By making an effort to really understand all the ins and outs of puberty, we can gi

Michelle Mitchell, author of A Girl’s Guide to Puberty and A Guy’s Guide to Puberty, shares her top tips preparing young people for puberty. Rather than cringing at the awkwardness, Michelle suggests we can embrace body changes as the beautiful part of life they are!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesPuberty is a pretty intense experience for both teens and parents! Kids are going through a million different changes throughout their minds and bodies, while parents watch from the sidelines and try not to get caught in the crossfire! Although the mood swings can be brutal, one of the hardest parts of parenting a kid through puberty is wondering if you gave them all the right talks to prepare them for this crazy ride.Although having the puberty talk is hard, it’s not something that can be pushed aside. If no one walks a teens through the changes their body is experiencing, they can feel isolated. They may think th

Kevin Roose, author of Futureproof, speaks with us about what AI and automation means for the future of humans--and how to speak with teens to prepare them to remain relevant in the information age.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesOur kids are heading into a new era–one full of self driving cars, automated grocery shopping and endless social media. They’re growing up surrounded by technology, and these gizmos and gadgets only become more prevalent every year. It’s nice to imagine a future where robots do all the work and we humans sit back with our feet up–but it’s also scary to imagine a world so controlled by computers that our kids might just lose their humanity!It’s understandable to be worried about your teen coming of age in this environment. They’re entering a job market where employment opportunities are slowly being eradicated by automation. People like travel agents and bankers have been forced to w

Karl Pillemer, author of Fault Lines: Fractured Families and How to Mend Them explains how seemingly small disagreements can grow to jeopardize relationships, and what parents of teens should know about patching up arguments and preventing permanent damage.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full Show NotesWe have arguments with our teens about little things everyday–what to have for dinner, whether they can take the car out, what they’re wearing to school that day, et, etc. And although these skirmishes can seem small, they tend to add up. Suddenly, you tell your teen to put away their shoes one day, and they’re screaming at you, saying you’re ruining their life. It’s not the shoes that have them hysterical, it’s the cumulative effect of all the little disagreements over time!Most of the time when these fights erupt, no one wants to apologize first. Distance can grow between the two of you. You become more and more certain th

Ned Johnson, author of Conquering the SAT and The Self-Driven Child, joins the show a second time to share his top tips for beating any standardized test--and they are all things under a teen’s control!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesThere’s no singular experience in teenage life quite like the SAT. Unlike the grueling four year academic curriculum, it occurs for only 180 minutes–and determines whether or not a teen is accepted to the school of their dreams. Needless to say, this is likely a significant cause of anxiety for you and your teen alike.A lot of programs out there promise your teen instant success at standardized tests, but in reality, performing well is much more complicated than just quick tips and tricks. Beyond simply putting in the reps, acing the ACT or SAT requires teens to understand their own thinking. It takes a serious mastery over anxiety and external pressures to keep a clear head and

Julie Lythcott-Haims, author of Your Turn and How to Raise an Adult, brings to the show her vast knowledge of the psychology of emerging adults. How can we help our teens and 20somethings turn out well?If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesWhen kids leave the nest, it can be terrifying to see them go. As a parent, you may feel that your whole life has led up to this moment, and you might worry that you haven’t done enough. You want your kid to take on the world and succeed, but you worry they might come home crying and asking for their old bedroom back.As scared as you might be, the terror of leaving home is even worse for young adults themselves. Life is full of trials and tribulations, and it’s scary without someone there to hold their hand. You probably remember the fear you felt when you first left home, how unpredictable and challenging every minute was.Even though adulting is hard, we as parents can start pr

Jonah Berger, PhD, bestselling author of The Catalyst and Contagious, shows us the most effective way to be catalysts for change. The first step is to uncover what barriers stop teens from changing right now.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesIt’s not easy to talk teens into anything. Simply getting them to clean their room or finish their stats homework is a nightmare! It seems that as soon as you ask them to do something, they do the opposite, just to spite you. It can feel like you’re hitting the same wall over and over, never finding a way through.Beyond just the realms of homework and household chores, this inability to get through to teens can have dire repercussions. If a teen is developing a serious drug problem or skipping school everyday, we need a way to reach them and help them get back on a better path. How can we break the cycle and finally get teens to listen?Our guest today is here to share his

Dr. Michael Gurian, author of Saving Our Sons, The Stone Boys, and 20+ books, joins us for a riveting discussion on the hidden ways in which our institutions and communication hurts boys. Not all is lost: there are plenty of ways we can help boys grow into emotionally resilient and thriving men! If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesIn today’s culture, it may seem like the conversation around emotional wellbeing has moved on from solely focusing on women and girls. Yet, we rarely address the emotional wellbeing of boys and men in our cultural institutions like school, work, the family structure, or in our government’s policies. Whether it’s responding to a failed math exam, dealing with a breakup, managing an avalanche of responsibilities while entering adulthood, or dealing with trauma, we need to develop a system that helps boys process their emotions. Luckily, that’s exactly what I talk about in this week’s Tal

Lydia Fenet, author of The Most Powerful Woman in the Room is You, talks about the top skills young people need to become confident, successful adults who can command any room they walk into--or at least, how they can shine in their own strength. One key? Practice failing...a lot!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesTeenagers are inclined to worry about everything—the phones they have, the clothes they wear, the clique they belong to. They think everything they do will give others a reason to judge them. And unfortunately these insecurities prevent teens from achieving their goals. They’re so afraid of judgement and failure that they’d rather not try at all.As a parent who was once a teen, you can’t help but empathize with them. There may have been a myriad of opportunities you’ve missed out on in your teens because you were too afraid to try them. But the lifetime of experiences you’ve had since your youth has t

Dr. Anita Collins, music educator and author of The Music Advantage, explains the surprising and long-lasting positive effects of music on the teen brain. Your teen doesn’t have to be a prodigy to benefit from picking up an instrument!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesIf you feel like your child isn’t living up to their full potential because they get distracted too easily or lose focus of their own goals, just imagine how hard it will be for them to complete important tasks as adults when their responsibilities lie outside of their personal interests. Today, teens have so much going on in their lives that it can be difficult to commit to tasks that they’re not particularly passionate about: maintaining good grades for college admissions, managing chores, and consistently showing up for work. Fortunately, there are ways to help your teen develop discipline in their life.It’s great if your teen has a personal h

Lisa Cron, author of the new book Story or Die, shows us how to use and create powerful stories that can drive teens to change their bad behavior without you even asking. If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesOften as parents we think telling our teen the facts about texting and driving or vaping will show them that they need to change their behavior. The danger is so clear! When we are in the same room or car as our teen, they may go along with us, but spewing facts at someone rarely causes a person to affect long-term changes to their behavior. But how exactly can you persuade your teen to change for the better if they reject facts? The answer is simple: tell a story.We are affected by stories every moment of the day. In fact, our brains are wired to create narratives about the world and our own lives. Rarely do objective facts persuade as strongly as an emotionally engaging story. But telling a story properly i

Dr. Joshua Coleman, author of Rules of Estrangement and When Parents Hurt, offers insight on how to repair fractured relationships. Plus, why parental estrangement is becoming increasingly common and what we can do to prevent it in the first place.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesAfter all the blood, sweat, and tears of raising a kid, any parent would want a good relationship with a son or daughter that’s reached adulthood. But sometimes, conflicts that start small during the teenage years grow more intense, and parent-child relationships are ruined by resentment. Many parents find themselves painfully estranged from their grown children after they’ve left the nest. The sad part is, these rifts could have been mended before teens grew into adults, if only parents knew the right approach.Oftentimes, parents do attempt to remedy deep conflicts with teens, but they go about it in the wrong way. Although they hav

Michelle Icard, author of the new book Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen, joins us to chat about the most important discussions to have with young people these days. We’ll also cover how to make them go smoothly and what parents can do to minimize awkwardness (and arguments) in the process!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesSay you’ve got a touchy topic you want to approach your teen about–maybe you found a vape in their room! You know that the moment you bring it up, your teen will explode and slam the door in your face. Or, even if you are able to sit down and have a real discussion, you’re worried they’ll ask you a question you don’t know the answer to...and you’ll be caught like a deer in headlights! You might be so stressed about the conversation that you just don’t bring your concerns up at all.Avoiding these tricky talks can be tempting, but ignoring them can have serious consequences. If no one walks a tee

Roy F. Baumeister, PhD, bestselling author of Willpower and The Power of Bad, helps us understand our tendency to focus on the negatives and why it’s not all bad. Not winning “the best parent” awards? Turns out that’s not what matters for a successful teen.If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesWhen teens find out their friends are hanging out without them, or they didn’t get a part in the school play, they suddenly act like it’s the end of the world! No matter how hard you try to convince them that it’s really not a big deal and that there will be other opportunities in the future, they just can’t seem to get over it. Then, even when they appear to be back to their usual self for a while, it seems like every week something new goes wrong. They just can’t stop making mountains out of molehills!This focus on the negative expands just past dramatic teens–you might notice it in your own experiences. Even when you have

Rebecca Reid, journalist and author of Rude, sheds light on the surprising positives to rudeness and how we could all get a bit more rude without offending anyone!If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! Full show notesIt’s easy to get caught up worrying about your kid behaving rudely when you’re not around. You might be picturing them going to the neighbor's house and asking for food they weren’t offered, forgetting to say please and thank you, and causing a huge mess without cleaning it up. No one wants a kid with no manners, so we tend to push politeness onto kids with a fervor. We often try so hard to keep kids from being rude that we force them to swing too far in the other direction, towards being overly courteous, saying “sorry” for everything and letting others walk all over them.When we teach our kids to be apologetic, we can do more harm than good. Raising an overly submissive teen can mean that they’re not comfortable ra