The Terri Cole Show

What if real transformation doesn't require blowing up your life? In this episode, Terri sits down with meditation teacher and author Light Watkins to discuss his book The Year You Transform and the fastest, most accessible path to lasting change. They explore why success doesn't always lead to fulfillment, the myth of the "Eat, Pray, Love" transformation, and how small, intentional discomfort (like cold showers, forgiveness, or quitting complaining) can radically shift your mindset. If you're feeling stuck, unfulfilled, or craving deeper purpose, this conversation will show you how to create real change—from the inside out. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/808

Many people can communicate just fine until a conflict arises.  Then the nervous system gets activated, and suddenly you're either shutting down, getting defensive, or saying things you don't mean.  Sound familiar? Our nervous systems get activated during conflict. It's normal for communication to be more challenging when you're activated than when you're not. That's just biology. When you understand how your body responds to stress, you give yourself a chance to communicate more effectively. When you're in conflict, what happens for you? Do you shut down?  Do you get loud?  Or begin attempting to please or appease the other person? I'm going to walk you through the top challenges I see as a psychotherapist. And I've put together a guide with some scripts for you at terricole.com/guide. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/807

Does fear feel like a stoplight in your head? Have you ever backed down from something important because it scared you? Today's guest, former U.S. Marine Corps Officer Jill Schulman, is here to help you rethink how you respond to fear. Listen to learn why fear is a part of bravery and you should "do it scared" instead of waiting to feel fearless. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/806

I've been hearing from so many of you that you're feeling overwhelmed by what's happening in the world right now. And if you are, you're normal. Because it is overwhelming. We were not designed to be in this hyper-aroused nervous system state for as long as we've been. Our bodies aren't meant for it. Our minds aren't meant for it. And yet here we are, living in a 24-hour bad news cycle that literally never ends. You know, it didn't used to be this way. There was a time when the nightly news was one person reporting on the day's events without editorializing. Now it's a circus of talking heads and pundits and narratives coming at you from every direction. And if you're trying to be a well-informed, good global citizen without being buried under a tidal wave of bad news, that's a really hard line to walk. If you're feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, anxious, or paralyzed, this one is for you. And you're not alone. I created a free guide including a guided meditation called One Love to go along with this post. You c

Are you struggling with codependency, hyper-independence, or feeling lonely in your relationships? In this episode of The Terry Cole Show, therapist and bestselling author Nedra Tawwab shares powerful insights from her new book The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency and Connection Without Losing Yourself. We explore attachment styles, boundaries, healthy dependency, and how to stop expecting one person to meet all your emotional needs. Learn how to create balanced, fulfilling relationships without losing yourself in the process. If you're working on healing anxious or avoidant attachment, improving boundaries, or building deeper connections — this conversation is for you. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/804

Whether you are or partnered this Valentine's Day, you shouldn't wait for someone else's permission to feel loved. By now, it's a tradition: I'm sharing my annual Valentine's Day ritual to help you rest, relaxed, and love yourself this Valentine's Day, no matter what your other plans are.  Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/803 

Dannah had dreamed of a career in law enforcement since childhood, but her life was turned upside down right before college graduation, when a trusted mentor told her she was too empathetic for a career as a federal agent. How could she move forward when her true self and her true calling seemed to conflict? She found a way– as an author and expert who helps women navigate life with both confidence and safety. Listen to today's episode for more of her story and lots of tips to navigate our unsafe world without getting paranoid. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/802

Does your chest ever tighten when your phone rings and you see it's someone in your family who you know needs something? Does your stomach drop when you get a text message that says, "We need to talk"? If you're already exhausted before you say yes to a whole plethora of things your family of origin may need from you, this post is for you. Family obligations are something I have had a complicated relationship with. Growing up, I felt a deep loyalty to my family of origin, particularly my mother and my sisters. And it got complicated when I fell in love with my husband and became a bonus mom to three teenage sons. There was so much going on, and the truth is, you can't really prioritize both. There's a natural shift that happens when you have a family of your own, or like me, you marry into a family. And when I was the one keeping it all together in my family of origin, I had to really decide what I was going to do. I was confronted with the extent of my obligation. So let's talk about family obligations, guil

Do you think you're codependent? Or are you unsure? In this post, I'm going to walk you through nine questions to help you understand, pretty conclusively, if you are a high-functioning codependent. I want you to walk away with a clear snapshot of your own codependent behaviors. And I want to be clear: this is a no-judgment zone. If we get really judgmental, we're not going to look at what we need to look at. If we let shame dictate what we examine, we'll stay in denial. And then nothing changes. You deserve to create relationships, lives, and careers that thrill and fulfill you. So let's look honestly at where you are. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/800

When you're a high-functioning codependent, you don't look stuck. You look capable. You're the one who pulls everything together, gets it all done, and rarely asks for help. People see you as someone who has it handled. But there's a cost. And recovering from being a high-functioning codependent is the path to living the happy, healthy, balanced life you deserve. I created the HFC Recovery Code because people kept asking me for a condensed list to help them remember their rights and responsibilities when they're feeling overwhelmed or pulled toward doing too much. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/799

I want to start with a question. When you want something, do you have a way of talking yourself out of it? Like, let's be "realistic"? Or say the odds are slim? Do you allow yourself to want what you want with all your heart? That's what this episode of The Terri Cole Show is all about. We're going to talk about manifesting. Note: This is a little woo, I'll admit. But this is one real aspect of how I've created my current life. I believe that what we think about and what we feel impacts what happens in our lives. So let's get into it. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/798

In my almost three decades as a psychotherapist, I've seen passive-aggressive anger quietly destroy more relationships than infidelity. It's a slow drip of poison. And most of us don't even realize we're doing it. Do you ever say you're fine when you're not? Use sarcasm to let someone know you're pissed off instead of just saying it? Or are you ever on the receiving end of these behaviors? If you've done it or been on the receiving end of it, welcome to being a human in relationships with other people. On this episode of The Terri Cole Show, we are going to discuss passive-aggressive anger. Why we do it, what it looks like, and what we can do instead. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/797

When two people with the same traumatic experience find one another, is it an incredible coincidence, or simple fate? Gabrielle Stone and Taymour Ghazi don't know the answer either, but it happened to them. On today's episode, Gabrielle and Taymour share their long journey to finding one another and holding one another in healing after each had a childhood experience encountering the bodies of their deceased parents. They also describe how they found time to write their new book Finding You Through Finding Me while also caring for their newborn child. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/796

Have you ever looked at people who seem to have figured it out? They're in their sixties, seventies, or eighties, and they're healthy. They're happy. They're in great relationships. And you think, "what do they know that I don't?"  Guess what? We don't have to wonder anymore. The Harvard Study of Adult Development is the longest longitudinal study ever done on physical and emotional well-being. Over 80 years, researchers tracked people across their entire lives to answer one question: what actually makes life feel good? The results were surprising: The quality of your relationships is the number one predictor of your mental health, your physical health, and your overall life satisfaction. It isn't money, success, fame, productivity, or hustling harder. It's not achieving some perfect version of yourself. On today's episode, I'm sharing some objective ways you can make your life happier and healthier, according to 80 years of research. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/795

Before you write a single resolution this year, I want you to try something different. It's a ritual I've been doing for over a decade, and it's completely changed how I move from one year into the next. Here's the thing: New Year's resolutions don't work. And I'm inviting you right now to trade yours in for something that will not only open your mind and your heart, but will powerfully clear the way for you to actually create what you want for the next 12 months. Here's why resolutions fall flat: we try to decide what we want to change without ever processing the year that just happened. How can we know what shifts we need to make if we haven't unpacked where we've been? This ritual is different. My hope is that it helps you process the experiences of 2025, raise your awareness about the lessons learned, and release what no longer serves you as we move into the next twelve months. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/794 Apply for the Terri Cole Membership if you want guidance in nurturin

Discover why menopause isn't the end—it's your most powerful beginning. Dr. Mindy Pelz, bestselling author of "Age Like a Girl," reveals the groundbreaking neuroscience behind menopause and how this transition rewires your brain for leadership, confidence, and purpose. Learn why 40% of our lives are designed to be lived WITHOUT our reproductive system, the evolutionary "grandmother hypothesis," and practical tools to navigate this transformation. From the neurochemical shift that eliminates people-pleasing to finding what truly brings you joy, this conversation will completely change how you view menopause. Perfect for women in perimenopause, menopause, or post-menopause—plus anyone who wants to understand this revolutionary life stage. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/793

Do you feel like you're overworking without feeling satisfied? Do you have difficulty accepting praise or compliments? Do you suffer from perfectionism? Do you have trouble asserting yourself with your clients? If you're nodding your head yes, then today's episode is for you! On today's episode, we're exploring how your inner child might be influencing your business decisions and how to put your adult self back in charge. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/792

The fawn response is the fourth trauma reaction beyond fight, flight, and freeze. Childhood experiences create patterns of people-pleasing that disconnect you from yourself. Meg shares her personal journey from a volatile, addiction-affected home to clear boundaries. Along the way, she reveals practical tools including her NICER technique for managing anxiety and overthinking. Stop self-silencing, set boundaries without guilt, and reconnect with your authentic self. Are you struggling with people-pleasing, conflict avoidance, or feeling uncertain who you really are? This episode is perfect for you. Plus, we chat about grieving relationships that will never be and creating a sense of home within yourself. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/791

Are you managing other people's feelings more than you're managing your business? Are you doing tasks that drain you because you don't know how to delegate without guilt? Or you don't trust people to do it right? Are you walking on eggshells around your own team? If you're a woman in a position of power, creating healthy boundaries at work can be challenging. You may feel mean or selfish. But disordered boundaries don't just make you tired; they can also cap your success. In today's episode, I'm sharing tips to help you become less drained, more productive, and more energized at work. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/790

Are you stuck in people-pleasing, perfectionism, and emotional exhaustion? Nurse practitioner and somatic therapist Baya Albina reveals what "emotional outsourcing" really means and how it's sabotaging your relationships and health. Learn about "functional freeze", constantly doing but feeling nothing and discover practical steps to reconnect with your body, set boundaries without guilt, and stop fixing everyone around you. If you can't relax when someone's upset or always put others first, this conversation will change everything. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/789