Jason And Todd Talk Through Lousy Films

Molly is a movie where Elisabeth Shue plays an autistic person. What's weird is Todd's TV just dies in the middle of the movie, and undeterred Jason and Todd switch to watching on Todd's computer, and first person they see is Todd's late father-in-law right there in the picture! Looking at Elisabeth Shue naked! Don't know what it all means, but Todd got really freaked out.

Dragged Across Concrete is a very long dirty cop thriller that has precious little of anything actually being dragged across concrete. Jason and Todd talk about this particular director's other movies, the fine line between exploitation entertainment and nazi propaganda, and how anyone who has any kind of faith in any element of the United States government isn't paying any attention. Also, racism.

Heaven is a movie about having faith and what happens when a Christian dies or something like that. It's really awful. Jason and Todd talk about why faith-based movies are so attractive for Jason, whether or not they would be surprised to find Donald Trump in heaven, and they also ponder why heaven is just a few white fences, walls, and astro turf.

Avenging Force is one of these Canon films starring Michael Dudikoff, and it's surely lousy, but damn if it isn't the most fun take on The Most Dangerous Game this side of Hard Target with Van Damme. Jason and Todd talk about the movie they were supposed to watch but it was no longer available, The Devil's Workshop starring Radha Mitchell. They really don't remember anything much about it, so they turn their attention mostly to the magnificence of the charismatic Steve James. And maybe a little about being terrified of current events, and their backs hurt. Anyway. Jason liked it.

I Am Sam is a movie starring Sean Penn as a special needs person, as supported by special needs people also playing special needs people. Jason and Todd talk about why this movie remained a punchline in other movies for years after its release, what exactly the "it factor" is, and how to be a narc in a professional entertainment industry situation. Also, they have to keep telling the cat to stop nibbling on all the damn wires.

Hobo with a Shotgun is a violently silly movie with Rutger Hauer. Jason isn't as into as Todd, which naturally leads them down a path to discuss cats, Shia LaBeouf's art installation, and whatever the name is of the guy who directed that thing that was pretty good.

Flight from Ashiya is an old movie about a rescue team led by a racist guy who hates Yul Brenner for being Japanese, which of course he is not. Jason and Todd talk about the aesthetic of model work versus cartoons, the movie Civil War which is somewhat dumb, and how weed makes it impossible to remember anything that happens in the Clint Eastwood movie called Firefox.

Fear City is an Abel Ferrara movie with Tom Berenger and a bunch of really famous actresses being exploited for cheap thrills. Jason thinks it's gross, and Todd does do, but they are watching this thing anyway. Stuff other than Fear City being discussed: Shoot to Kill starring Tom Berenger, Switchback starring Dennis Quaid which is not to be confused with Shoot to Kill, and even the dramatic implications of certain types of men's jackets.

The Reflecting Skin is a kinda vampire movie directed by the same guy who did The Passion of Darkly Noon. His titles are weird. And there's always that Viggo. But that doesn't matter, because Jason and Todd are talking about funerals, tricks for remembering names, and the trouble with greasers.

The Passion of Darkly Noon is a movie that is exactly the movie its title suggests. Jason and Todd talk about future tragedies a couple cast members would face, the fact that golden hour is not at noon, and the how important it is not to take in stray men stumbling through the forest behind your house. It's a lot to digest, but so is The Passion of Darkly Noon. So, hop on the shoe boat with us, won't you?

Life of the Party is a Melissa McCarthy movie that made $65 million at the box office. It's a kind of riff on Back to School. Jason hates it. Todd loves Melissa McCarthy no matter what. They also talk a lot about losers and what should be done with them. Spoiler alert: at the end they feel terrible.

No Safe Haven is a revenge thriller with one Wings Hauser, easily the most favored actor of this podcast. Jason's backside is bothering him and Todd is facing a professional existential crisis, so they mostly ignore Wings in order to talk about what is wrong with society and how much they would like to fix it except they have no money. Oh, and Doctor Zhivago. 

Possession is a horror movie with Sam Neil that feels like you are watching scene work from an acting class. Jason and Todd sometimes get mesmerized by the acting in this movie enough to actually talk about the movie itself, but they also talk about children's television, anal surgery, and what kinds of guns they like to shoot. Also, they breakdown the Oscar movies they've seen. Which isn't all of them. Or even that many. Jason likes Dream Scenario more than The Zone of Interest, even though the former was nominated for nothing.

Dogs is a Jaws rip-off with delightful domesticated dogs instead of a shark. It's got that guy who played Fletch's ex-wife's lawyer in those Chevy Chase movies. Anyway, Jason and Todd mostly talk about two William Friedkin films of varying quality, that guy who directed that Oscar thing that directed other movies they might have liked, and also fantasize out loud about cosmetic surgeries they wish they could afford. They do acknowledge the movie they are watching, mostly because even the attack dogs are adorably friendly and just want hugs - which they get a lot of, properly.

Dangerous Men is a DIY passion project by a guy named John Rad about a woman getting revenge on men for being total douche canoes. Its running time is an hour and twenty minutes, but this podcast lasts for more than two hours because Jason and Todd have to talk about the horrors of aging, the ups and downs of mushroom trips, and the third season of True Detective.

The Postman is a three hour Waterworld without water. Jason and Todd talk through the whole thing, mostly about our weight insecurities, the gift of Tom Petty, and the power of The Church over filmmaking. After this, they'll see you in the New Year, which is an election year. Oh yeah, they also talk about suicide.

Silverado is an 80s western that Jason hates so much he wanted to do a two and a half hour podcast about it. Of course, Jason and Todd barely talk about the movie at all, instead talking about Theresa Russell, the importance of the audition process, and then get in a debate about Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio and Julianna Margulies. Also they talk about crying.

Tough Guys Don't Dance is a neo-noir picture from Norman Mailer, in which homophobic misogynists do horrible things to each other in Provincetown, MA. Jason and Todd talk about what this movie meant in their childhoods, discuss Jason's troubles operating an iPad, and Todd reminds Jason that he was once Albert Maysles' house boy for a weekend.

Airport is a movie about an airport run by incompetents. Jason and Todd talk about why they love disaster movies even though that's ghoulish, Jason discusses how various health troubles make sex uninviting, and Todd remembers his favorite shot from Airport '77. It's all right here, folks!

Blades is an 80s movie about a killer lawnmower terrorizing a golf course. Jason and Todd mostly talk about Todd's son, the homeless crisis, and how this movie is way better than any Marvel film. The effects are better.