Jerry Banfield

Hear what I do when I am mad at a partner that helps me snap out of it faster which avoids the majority of the pain! This works with my wife, daughter, business partners, family, and friends. The basic strategy I use is to first notice that I am experiencing the pain of being angry and then to start focusing on remembering that the most important part of my relationship is that I chose to love the person. Most of the pain of being angry is in forgetting the most important part of the relationship with is how you feel about the partner. Instead of continually fueling the anger by reviewing what happened to "cause" the anger and what I am going to do about it, I shift the focus inside to see how much it hurts to be angry and focus on what I would choose to feel if I had a choice which is love. I use an example with my mother where I remember that I chose to be her son with the same being true for my friends, family, and wife. To be a good parent, I know it is critical to avoid being angry at my daughter be