Wife Of An Alcoholic: Recovery | Loving An Alcoholic | Codependency| Michelle Lisa Anderson

Detaching is a big buzzword in the recovery community. I hear a lot from the women in our secret Facebook group that detaching with love is almost impossible because it requires you to remove your emotions from the situation and from the outcome. So, let’s say your loved one starts making bad choices by having a few drinks. Your instant reaction is to get upset and to feel like you’ve been punched in the gut again because they lied. They said they were going to get better. They said they weren't drinking. Your detachment would mean you go through that immediate process, and then you auto correct yourself, and you say, “I’m not going to go in there and nag. I’m not going to point out that they know that I know. I am not going to yell or scream or have a temper tantrum. I’m not going to sulk. I’m just going to let that dysfunction happen, and I’m going to move on.” That’s ultimately what detachment is: it’s taking away your power from somebody else’s actions. It’s saying, “I’m going to choose to be responsible