Dopey: The Dark Comedy Of Drug Addiction | Heroin | Cocaine | Meth | Weed | Drugs | Lsd | Recovery | Sobriety

We talk about smuggling drugs into prison and the merits/drawbacks of giving/receiving anal sex vs oral sex. Dave gives a glimpse of the dynamics that drive Dopey. We talk about why we suck at advertising. Bill from Canada leaves a voice memo about hallucinogenics (ehhh?). 

Dave shares his gratitude for the positive changes in his life, including his new house and the birth of his second daughter. Dave also talks about what it was like when he was using, and how that impacted his family life. We play a voice memo from someone in Amsterdam about getting even after having cocaine stolen. Dave talks about a random encounter with Hannah at a meeting; Hannah was the first person to get the Dopey tattoo. We discuss prison rape. And lastly, we discuss a funny interaction with the legendary Artie Lange. 

Dave and Chris get down remotely and chop it up about drugs and dumb shit: meth, 12-step hackneyed lingo, reviews, yada yada. Im really lazy and dont want to write this description because im on vacation. O yea, we play a really funny voice memo about getting saved by Vitamin Water. 

Stephanie Wittels Wachs calls in and tells us about her brother's drug use and death. Harris Wittels was best known being a writer and the executive producer for the T.V. show Parks and Recreation. Stephanie recently wrote a book about her brother's life - Everything Is Horrible and Wonderful: A Tragicomic Memoir of Genius, Heroin, Love, and Loss. After Stephanie, we call Hippy-Hobo Andrew's mom who tells us about the last few days of his life, and what it has been like dealing with his loss. 

Comedian Jessa Reed calls in and tells us all about her tweaker days. Stories include carrying a dead owl around for weeks and trying to breathe life into it via meth smoke, and drinking her own piss (repeatedly) because it had traces of methamphetamine. Jessa, a dopey hall-of-famer, also tells us how she finally got clean after a decade of pure debauchery. Check out Jessa's podcast, the Mormon and the Meth-Head. We play a voicememo from Korey about the time he shot a goofball and ran from the non-existant police for three hours straight and tore his MCL. Episode brought to you by the I Am Sober app, a great way to track your milestones in recovery. 

Combat vet Rob leaves a voicemail about the time he got dope sick (diarrhea) while he was under fire by enemy troops. Chris theorizes what would happen if a clean drug addict got amnesia. Dave and Chris reminisce about the best bathrooms they got high in. Dave talks about wetting the bed in sobriety. Dave makes up his own Leonard Cohan song. 

Chuck Negron of Three Dog Night calls in and talks about his using days and his recovery. He tells us about the time he had so much sex that his dick exploded, the time he stole Gregg Allman's watch to support his habit, buying 5000 Seconal, and the stroke of luck that helped him avoid the Wonderland murders. Chuck wraps up the episode with what it took to get clean after 37 rehabs, and an update with what he is doing with his life now. Check out his book, Three Dog Nightmare!

We play a voicememo from "IG" about buying drugs from a police officer. Dave talks about going to a waterpark; Chris wonders what it would be like for Dave to shoot cocaine before going down the "big slide." Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling from the Howard Stern Show calls in and gives us an update about his life. Jackie talks about his rise in show business, his time on the Stern Show, and his eventual decision to stop drinking. Jackie also shares stories about Rodney Dangerfield (he used to travel around with his own special eating bowl). Jackie concludes with a song for us and some information about his upcoming books. 

We play a voice memo from Ryan about the time he smoked meth, got psychotic, and thought people were trying to kill him. He pleaded with strangers to protect him and ultimately ended up hiding in a closet with several knives. Ryan is 7 months clean now and doing well. Alex calls in and tells us about the last days of his using, which included a manic episode and an unwanted tattoo of the word "lucky" above his dick. Dave talks about getting into trouble at work. 

Todd calls in from rehab! He owns up to using dope while recording Dopey several weeks ago, tells us about getting fired from his most recent job, talks about his horrible detox, and fills us in on how he's doing now. We call Omar and read him a negative comment about us trying to surpass the SHAIR podcast in reviews. We read several emails and reviews, one of which involves a young woman getting locked out of her hotel while naked and intoxicated. 

Dave talks about smoking weed while pitching his defunct pilot to Comedy Central, IFC, Netflix, and AMC. We play a voice memo from Buddy Rob about the time he stole dope from his dealer, nodded out in a parking lot, and got fired from work on his first day. Maegan and Bobby from the Addictionary podcast showcase their charming Boston accents and tell some recovery/using stories. Maegan talks about visiting her dad in prison as a child and returning to speak at the same prison as an adult. Bobby talks a bit about his using days and the old-school Boston. 

Chris has a glorious reunion with one of his former physicians, Dr. Drew Pinsky! Dr. Drew and Chris reminisce on Chris' treatment experience during the height of his addiction. Dr. Drew comments on the difficulty of treating addiction, the failings of the rehab industry, the opioid epidemic, and the spiritual vacuum in the United States. Dave asks Dr. Drew about Celebrity Rehab, specifically addressing some of the critical response. We talk about how trauma and attachment relate to substance use; Dr. Drew ponders Dave's own attachment style. Dave tells Dr. Drew his seizure story. Lastly, Dr. Drew shares about the direction his career is headed, and Dave asks him what his dream project would be. 

Paul Gilmartin from the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast calls in and tells us about his depression, sobriety, and his former show Dinner and a Movie. Dave and Chris argue about whose God is better. Dave talks about getting offered drugs at work. Chris tells a story about a friend whose life was saved by her khaki shorts. Dave quizzes Chris on his stupidity. And Cormac is the Billy Preston of Dopey. 

Dave and Chris play a great voice memo from Amanda who is struggling to clean. She talks about "wanting to want" to get clean. Dave and Chris delve into their own histories of drugs use, specifically addressing periods of ambivalence about stopping, and the ultimate turning points in the process. Dave and Chris also describe a recent interaction with Artie Lange.

Dave and Chris talk about buying drugs on Skid Row in LA... the closest thing to an open air drug market either of them witnessed in their using. Tim from Phily leaves a voice memo about running away from Teen Challenge (a rehab) with a woman and ending up in a very precarious situation. We read an email from John about extreme paranoia while on "Flakka."

Alana, aka whitelamborghinicountach aka hotgirlfuckedbylife, calls in again and tells us about the time she did drugs all night at Peter Gatien’s house. We sing “Bad Card” by Bob Marley, and answer questions posted on instagram. Our new Dopey interns, Melanie and Tim, call in and tell us a bit about themselves. We play a voice memo from Chris about blacking out on benzos.

Chris' friend, Laura, calls in and tells us about one of her last using days; she shot cocaine while driving and got into three accidents in a single day. Laura also tells us how she stays sober today. Dave's dad comes on the show for a bit and shares some of the darker moments from Dave's past. Chris talks about expressing his dog's anal glands. We play a voice memo about puking donuts while high. Lastly, we play a new song by Cormac, "Restless."

Dave's rehab friend from 15 years ago, Eddie, calls into the show and tells some dopey stories, including ruining a taxi while he was high. Eddie's dopey stories are accentuated by the fact that he is now sober 12 years and a doctor. We play a voice memo from Stephanie about the time she sprung someone from rehab and he overdosed shortly thereafter. Chris tells a story about getting drunk on the way to treatment, and then causing a scene when he arrived. We play a voice memo from someone who got high on the job and crashed the company truck. 

Former MTV host and music personality, Matt Pinfield, calls into Dopey and tells us about his addiction addiction and recovery. We hear about the early days of MTV, hanging out with David Bowie, and Matt's gradual decline into alcoholism and cocaine addiction. Matt also tells us about doing cocaine with Marilyn Manson, getting cocaine for Oasis, and a mishap with hot dog. Check out his book, "All These Things That I've Done."

Dave's childhood friend, Jim, comes on the show and tells us a bit about Dave as a young man. Jim shares several tripping stories, which include getting punched in the face after trying to hold a stranger's baby, and pooping his pants (intentionally) while driving in a car with a bunch of strangers. Amanda Lauren also calls in and tells us about "Dryish January," doctor shopping as a young girl, and other details from her life. Amanda is a co-host of the show "Things We're Too Lazy to Blog About." Lastly, we close out with a new Dopey original song by Jon.