Pirate Monk Podcast

On this episode: Nate and Aaron discuss delight in walking alongside others and seeing their growth and first-time experiences. Our Guest: Andy Gullahorn, singer/songwriter, musician, and musical guest at the 2023 Samson Summit in Van TX. Andy is also nearly an O.G. Samson brother! Discussing the benefits of sobriety, including creativity, being in your own body physically and emotionally, vulnerability, and the value of the recovery experience. Andy guides us to honor the experiences of what actually happened. Also discussed are sarcasm and the song writing process. Links:   Andy Gullahorn Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  S

On this episode: Nate and Aaron answer questions about patience in recovery, and speculate about Paul maybe wanting to wack off. Our Guest: Rebekah Vickery: Therapist, Allender Center trained, and Trauma Specialist. Rebekah shares her work concerning church and sexual trauma. Discussing the fault of spiritual bypass: ignoring the situation, feelings, what’s wrong, and focusing on religion. Sharing the importance of connecting to others to repair shame. Repairing “purity culture”: learning to (re)connect to your body, hunger, and feelings. The importance of Trader Joe's tissues. Links:   Heart Root Rebekah’s email Sponsor: Chris Inman - Porn Free Masculinity Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministr

On this episode: Nate and Aaron discussing grieving and wailing, one step at time. Q from A: Why is it important to have separate men's and women’s sex addiction recovery groups? Our Guest: Phil Dvorak: pastor, therapist, clinical director and church planter. Considering “Night of Joy” vs. “MTV Spring Break.” Phil discusses his journey to and from alcoholism. The importance of community, coming clean, and mentorship. The story of how recovery and Christ were integrated to start Recovery Church about 12 years ago. Links:   Recovery Church Movement Phil Dvorak Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women who have bee

On this episode: Nate and Aaron are in the ionosphere speculating. Q from A:   How much detail is appropriate to disclose to your spouse? Our Guest: Adam Young: author, therapist, speaker and podcaster. Adam talks about writing his upcoming book: Your Life Makes Sense. When we are not connected emotionally, interpersonally, and emotionally, we isolate, our brain fragments, and we tend to do whatever it takes to get peace in our bodies, frequently in addiction. Discussing attunement, and parents who don’t respond to their child’s emotions, orphaning them. Healing (recovery) includes grieving and feeling unfelt feelings, in the safety of another person. The human heart cannot heal with a cup of coffee, Bible, Journal, and a good view out the window. Links: Adam Young Sponsor: Chris Inman - Porn Free Masculinity Annual Retreat (featuring Adam Young): 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please dr

On this episode: Aaron is back with updates. Nate and Aaron answer questions from Albuquerque. Aaron introduces his new jingle. Our Guest: Jason Mathew: founder of Lead Me Not accountability software. Jason shares his story of porn, fantasy, and dating apps and his need for digital-wellness. The app tracks trends, sends alerts, syncs with calendars, promotes reflection, and introspection. It focuses on high levels of security for the user and partners while helping to maintain boundaries on Androids and ChromeBooks. Links:   jason@leadmenot.org Lead Me Not Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women who have bee

On this episode: Nate and guest host Chris Inman talk about kids leaving the house and becoming P.O.R.K. Our Guest: Laura Connell: author and trauma informed coach. Laura discusses how adverse childhood experiences (A.C.E. test) affect life expectancy and how to get those years back. She talks about how self-sabotage relates to childhood trauma. How willpower is not enough to stop self-sabotage from trauma. Other topics include reparenting and self-parenting, not being the victim while acknowledging the players in your story, and how to discover your identity while in healing and recovery. Links:  Laura Connell Books: Its Not Your Fault: The Subconscious Reasons We Self-Sabotage and How to Stop Guest Host: Chris Inman - Porn Free Masculinity, We Got Balls, The Mirror Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail

On this episode: Nate and guest host Tom Moucka discuss the difference between a therapist, coach, and Silas. Our Guest: Mari Lee: author, speaker, therapist, CSAT, trained in Gottman, betrayal trauma, complex trauma, sexual addiction and recovery, EMDR, and mindfulness based therapy. Mari discusses how her pain became her passion. We don’t have to live in the past, but the past lives in us. She explains the importance of disclosure in creating trust when working with couples and individuals. For some, the clinical relationship may be the first relationship where there is healthy attachment in an individual's life. Discussing that divorce is OK. Other topics include: shame, polyamory, LGBTQI, and throwing onion dip. Links:   Growth Counseling Services The Counselors Coach Books: Facing Heartbreak Workbook In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction by Gabor Maté Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the

On this episode: Nate and guest host Chris Inman discuss the awesomeness of Rob Chenoweth, retreats and new podcasts. Our Guest: Dr. Michael Barta: author, psychologist, therapist, CSAT, and 12-stepper. Michael discusses how to treat “what’s causing the rash” -- going deeper beyond the symptoms. Digging into the intimacy disorder, learning to co-regulate in community. The lack of stability, emotional security and mental safety that leads to the inability to regulate. An environment where mistakes are ok and not punished creates authenticity. Michael also discusses how the external trauma becomes about us. Links:   Dr. Michael Barta Books: TINSA: A Neurological Approach to the Treatment of Sex Addiction Guest Host: Chris Inman - Porn Free Masculinity, We Got Balls, The Mirror Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodca

On this episode: Nate and guest host Chris Inman update everyone on Aaron and Erin Our Guest: Michelle Mays: author, counselor and innovator. Michelle guides couples through healing and recovery from betrayal. Helping couples understand betrayal through attachment. She reminds us of the four attachment styles and how they affect both partners before and during recovery. Michelle also defines the three core injuries that happen to the betrayed partner. Contact and Book: Michelle Mays Guest Host: Chris Inman - Porn Free Masculinity, We Got Balls, The Mirror Upcoming events: Pure Desire Conference 2023 Samson Annual Retreat Sponsor: Life Works Counseling   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for t

On this episode: Aaron and guest-host/guest Nate Geyer discuss everything from Birkenstocks to stocks. Our Guest: Nate Geyer works for Begin Again Institute as an LPC and CSATC. He comes from a background of education as well as lots of personal experience. Nate shares his journey of therapy and story work to find healing and recovery. He discusses how he started at four years old and felt like just scenery in his own house. Sharing feelings of guilt while having done nothing wrong. Also sharing his successes as he finds healing in connection and intimacy. Links:   Begin Again Institute Boulder Recovery Institute Nate’s Email Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the wome

On this episode: Aaron and guest host Rob discuss Soul Architecture and how it works. Nate is still on a cruise. Our Guest: Kervins Clement: therapist CSAT, PHD candidate, husband, former sex addict. Kervins shares how growing up as a black Haitian immigrant impacted his addiction and recovery. Embracing ADHD and dyslexia, athletics, Young Life, community, crime, and sharing secrets. Identifying your struggle to learn to fight like hell. The importance of understanding your family and sharing your story with your kids. Kervins stresses the importance of community and letting others into your story as part of healing and growth. Links:   Lewisville Family Counseling kervinsclement@yahoo.com Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Socie

On this episode: Aaron and guest host Rob discuss breaking down walls and curiosity about others’ stories. Nate is on a cruise. Our Guest: Jonathan Merritt is an author, journalist, coach, and speaker. Learning to understand how news and opinion differ and how they change the reader. Embracing and investigating fear. Not allowing fear to tear us apart, especially when considering fear and faith. Are you covering fear with joy? Learning to investigate the stories of fear in your life as you grow. Jonathan guides us through engaging in healthy discussion and debate. Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Links:   Jonathan Merritt Books: Learning to Speak God From Scratch Learning to Walk in the Dark Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members o

On this episode: Aaron with an A and Erin with an E host while Nate is in Alaska. Our Guest: Mary Archibeque - addiction therapist and CSAT. Recovered drug addict turned drug addiction therapist, then gambling addiction therapist, and finally sex addiction therapist. Connecting to others through vulnerability and authenticity; no one cares what you know if they don’t know you care. You can’t care or work harder than the person you are helping. Intensity is a version of false intimacy or trauma bonding. Intimacy should be peaceful. Ask questions to determine if you replaced an addiction with a “healthier” addiction or if you are living healthy. Doing what’s healthy vs. what’s familiar. Links:   Mary at Psychology Today Mary at the Center for Relationship and Healthy Sexuality Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodca

On this episode: Nate fixes wiring. Aaron is stranded at home. They discuss emotions in the church and the shortcomings of online friends. Our Guest: Stephen McWhirter - musician, minister, husband, and father. Stephen shares his story of being a preacher's kid and recovered drug addict. Your story [of healing] matters. Jesus didn’t heal people the same way twice. Jesus is real, despite your experiences. Stories of redemption. Everyone has emotions. Everything is trying to emotionally manipulate you. What are you going to tune into? Links: Stephen McWhirter Books: The Case for Christ Sponsor: Life Works Counseling Annual Retreat: 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society and www.fiftysounds.com. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support

On this episode: Nate and Aaron don’t have time for buffoonery. Our Guest: Zachary Wagner, an American in England, writer, researcher, and ordained minister. We look at how was Jesus’ masculinity shaped the narratives of the church. Understanding myths about the need for sex. Replacing the purity paradigm with learning. Turning immature image of sex into mature understanding. Discussing sexual abuse crisis in culture and the church. Reflecting on how Jesus had intimate, nonsexual, relationships with both males and females. Links: Book: Non-Toxic Masculinity, Contact: Zachary Wagner Sponsor: Lifeworks Counseling and Coaching Events: 48 Hours of Frankness - Colorado Samson Summit   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support fo

On this episode: Nate and Aaron are back from England. Aaron has realizations and understands his feet. And a mysterious guest host is on the show. Our Guest: Cathy Loerzel:, author, coach, speaker, wife, and mother. Cathy, Co-founder of the Allender Center, talks about her next steps in life. Discussing loyalty and false loyalty: staying due to fear of being alone. Francis Weller’s premise of grief: “everything you love will die”. Growing when there wasn’t a plan B, while honoring and grieving your past. God calls us to spiritual and emotional maturity. Finding community with other survivors. Links: Contact, Coaching, Speaking, etc. Books: The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred work of Grief Sponsor: Lifeworks Counseling and Coaching Events: 48 Hours of Frankness - Colorado Samson Summit   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcas

On this episode: Aaron has end of high school anxiety. Nate is old enough to have a grandchild graduating college. Our Guest: Dr. Craig Cashwell is a professor at William and Mary College and trauma counselor. Competent and ethical integration of spirituality into the counseling process. Understanding spiritual bypass. What you resist, persists. Discussing “need shame” and toxic positivity. Underneath anger is fear. Undoing gender stereotypes. You can’t be real with a partner if you aren’t real with self. “We are all on the hot mess express!” Once you are real, you can’t be ugly except to those people that don’t understand. The courage to be vulnerable. Links: Bio and contact The Harbor 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society. For more information on this ministry, please

On this episode: Aaron paints a challenging image of himself. Nate engineers again. Both discuss medicating with work. Our Guest: Ron Williams: a pirate monk and coach shares his story that landed him in prison; the healing and hope that resulted; how his experiences have helped himself and other men grow; helping churches with their internal policies related to sex offenders. Links: Ron's coaching site, Ron's email 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Support for the women in our lives who have been impacted by our choices is available at sarahsociety.com. The Pirate Monk Podcast is provided by Samson Society, a ministry of Samson House, a 501(c)3 nonprofit. To enjoy future Pirate Monk podcasts, p

On this episode: Aaron unfriends on facebook. Nate listens to a new book. Our Guest: Blaine Hogan: actor, director, author, husband, and father. You know you have succeeded as a parent, if your kids go to therapy for different reasons than you did. You can’t understand where you are going, if you don’t know where you have been. Free people free people! Composing your future is much like composing a song. Understanding your past, future, and present using narrative therapy. Renewing of the mind, seeing through a new filter. Your stains becoming your greatest strengths. Your stories are epic. Links: Blaine Hogan Book: Exiting the Cave Book: No More Mr. Nice Guy 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society. For more information on this ministry, please visit samsonsociety.com.  Su

On this episode: Aaron markets the virtues of living in a sauna and learns about FOMO. Nate reads 6 books on an Alaskan cruise. Our Guest: Sam Black: a pirate monk, meeting host, author, journalist, and reporter. Sam educates pastors and church leaders on understanding pornography addiction, how it happens, early exposure, trauma and drama, and the volume of males and females consuming. How sharing your story opens the door to others opening up and sharing their stories. Explaining how Covenant Eyes uses AI to increase effectiveness and accountability reporting. Links: churchsupport@covenanteyes.com Covenant Eyes Books: Healing Church, The Porn Circuit Victory App: Apple, Android 2023 Samson Annual Retreat   If you have thoughts or questions that you'd like the guys to address in upcoming episodes or suggestions for future guests, please drop a note to piratemonkpodcast@gmail.com.   The music on this podcast is contributed by members of the Samson Society. For more information on this ministry, please visit s